People hate to get “ghosted” in any situation, personal or professional. But for job seekers who may already be struggling with self-esteem, it can be particularly devastating. Ghost Reply is a new online service that will help you compose and send an email nudge to the ghoster, sending a “kind reminder” telling them how unprofessional it is to leave someone hanging like that.
Ghost Reply wants to help you reach catharsis in all of this stressful mess of finding a job. Almost all of the problems and feelings are compounded by this confounded pandemic that has decimated areas of the workforce and taken jobs and threatened people’s financial security. It is understandable to want to lash out at those in power, and sending a Ghost Reply email to the recruiter or HR person may make you feel better in the short term.
In the long run, though, will it solve anything? Ghost Reply suggests it may make the HR person or recruiter reevaluate their hiring processes, indicating this type of email may help them see the error of their ways and start replying to all potential candidates. If it helps them reassess and be more considerate in the future and helps you find closure in the application/interview process, that would be the ideal outcome on all fronts. It is not likely this will happen, though.
The Ghost Reply sample email has the subject line “You have a message from a candidate!” Then it begins, “Hi, (name), You’re receiving this email because a past candidate feels like you ghosted them unfairly.” It then has a space for said candidate to add on any personal notes regarding the recruiter or process while remaining anonymous.
I get it. It’s upsetting to have someone disappear after you’ve spent time and energy applying, possibly even interviewing, only to hear nothing but crickets back from the recruiter or HR person you interacted with. It’s happened to me more than once, and it’s no bueno. We all want to be seen. We all want to be valued. Ghosting is hurtful. The frustration and disappointment, even anger, that you feel is certainly relatable. According to several sources, being ghosted after applying for a job is one of the top complaints from job seekers on the market today.
Will an anonymous, passive-aggressive email achieve your end? Will the chastened company representative suddenly have a lightbulb go off over their heads, creating a wave of change in company policy? I don’t see it. The first sentence of the sample email, in fact, is not going to be well received by HR.
When you start talking about what’s “unfair,” most HR people will tune out immediately. That kind of language in itself is unprofessional and is a red flag to many people. Once you work at a company and know its culture and have built relationships, then, maybe, just maybe, can you start talking about your work-related feelings. I believe in talking about our feelings, but rarely is a work scenario the best place to do so (I speak from experience). Calling it unprofessional is better, less about you and more about the other person’s behavior.
However, it’s unclear how productive Ghost Reply actually is. Or how anonymous, frankly. By process of deduction, the recipient of the email may be able to figure out who sent it, if it even makes it through the company’s spam filters. Even if they cannot pinpoint the exact person, it may cast doubts on several applicants or leave a bad taste in the recruiter’s mouth. It sounds like sour grapes, which is never a good thing.
There may be any number of reasons you didn’t get the job offer or interview, and they may or may not have something to do with you. Recruiters answer your burning questions, including why you may have been ghosted in this recent article in The American Genius.
Ultimately, you will never know why they ghosted you. If it makes you feel better or at least see the issue from both sides, the amount of job candidates ghosting recruiters after applying and even interviewing is equally high. Some people simply either have awful time management skills or awful manners, and at the end of the day, there’s not much you can do about that.
Focus on your own survival while job hunting, instead of these disappointing moments or the person who ghosts you. It will serve you better in the long run than some anonymous revenge email. There are other ways to deal with your frustration and anger when you do get ghosted, though. Try the classic punching your pillow. Try taking a walk around the block. If it helps to put your frustration into words, and it very well may, then do so. Write it on a piece of paper, then burn it. Or type it all in an email and delete it. For your own sake, do NOT put their email address in the “To” line, lest you accidentally hit “Send.”
The sooner you can let it go, the sooner you can move on to finding a better job fit for you.
Toby & Saide
March 12, 2008 at 10:16 pm
I’m sorry my judgement is clouded, I’ll have to read this again.
Ahh, yes.
I’m neither. I’m happy to compete with anyone, but there is no reason to get personal with it.
Rocky VanBrimmer
March 12, 2008 at 10:32 pm
Seeing that Toby and Saide are in my direct market, and my judgement is not clouded…
And for some reason, I would still enjoy meeting Toby for a cup of coffee or lucnh even. The date may be a dud, however I think Sadie could pay!
Rocky VanBrimmer
March 12, 2008 at 10:36 pm
By the way, its after midnight. EyE kaNt TyPe oAr sEpLL.
Ines
March 12, 2008 at 10:39 pm
It’s funny because when I was reading this, I wasn’t thinking who I was as the “type of company”, I was thinking of who my clients are and how to market to them. Whichever way you look at it, it goes back to who your audience is and who we are writing for as bloggers, and who we are marketing to whether the new and exiting web2.0 way or with traditional methods.
I’m so enjoying the marketing aspect of our business- and thinking that every move we make will determine how you attract business. —–sorry to switch it around on you…..maybe my judgement is clouded as well.
Ginger Wilcox
March 12, 2008 at 10:42 pm
I think I wear a halo and devil’s horns at the same time (and no I am not a whiner! 😮 )
I think you can embrace change and provide a different alternative while still retaining some traditional elements. I don’t believe it is all or nothing.
My Name Is Jeff Turner And My Halo Is In The Shop
March 13, 2008 at 12:08 am
From Seth Godin, “One of the hardest things to do is invent a brand with no opposite. You don’t have an anchor to play against.”
Lani Anglin-Rosales
March 13, 2008 at 9:20 am
Do you guys think Chemistry.com would be even a recognizable name if they weren’t the ANTI-eHarmony? I agree with Jeff that there’s nothing wrong with being the ANTI because with every product, there’s a segment that won’t want or like it, so why the heck not capitalize on that?
I believe the company I work for is the Anti-1.0 model. 🙂 No Trillionaire Realtor book subscriptions, no “tell me buddyman, what would you do if I told you I could sell your home for 20% above your neighbors’?” cold calling, or smarmy tricks.
Shailesh Ghimire
March 13, 2008 at 3:12 pm
I’m eHarmony – its the orgy promoted by Chemistry that got us into the credit mess…
Lani Anglin-Rosales
March 21, 2008 at 11:42 am
@Shailesh- OMG that is tooooo funny!
@Dawn- I had no idea, that’s insane! I think you’ve got a revolutionary idea, that “going to the park” thingy- wow, you should market that and make a billion dollars! 🙂 Thanks for coming over to Agent Genius, this world is WAY too small!!!