Fragrant Flowers
“Begonias, roses, creeping pig plants add color” (Not to mention bacon…)
“Windows repaced” (It seems they aren’t the only things marching to the tune of a different drummer.)
“Warrants provided” (Thank you, Barney Fife.)
“Info on insurance clam” (I hear he’s a mere shell of his former self.)
“Serving baked gods” (I’ll have what Bacchus is having.)
Looming Towers
“Safe didtance from electrcal tower” (Obviously not far enough…)
“Enjoy our cooking cass during open” (Did you marinate Cass in teriyaki first?)
“Flowering pants accent porch” (Well that explains the naked clown on a unicycle out front.)
“Hare flip in this area” (He and the clown should take their act on the road.)
“Yard has gone to pot” (Welcome to California – home of Wacky Tabacky.)
Austin Powers
“Fishy smell is not from the plumbing” (I’m sure the dead guy in the pool will be happy to hear that.)
“Old grouch on porch will be hauled away” (That’s what we keep telling Uncle Paddy when he throws his beer cans at the squirrels.)
“Open depend on whether” (Whether or not the seller smacks you upside the head?)
“1031 change” (Umm – what’s left of a twenty after buying a bottle of Beano?)
“Pubic Open 1-4 ” (Maybe that’s where the twenty bucks went.)
That’s it for this week, folks. remember: Spell well and sell.
I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.
