There was a spelling circus on the MLS this week, friends. Kim McMahon sent us a beauty from Chicago and Marco Giancola from Ft. Lauderdale found a side-splitter. Enjoy the performance!
Under the Big Top
“Buy or tent” (Offered by Ringling Brothers Realty.)
“Not hare Wedsday” (…But you’re a jackass today.)
“Near school an liberry” (…Then I suggest you check them out, you fruit cup.)
“Two car detected garage” (Half-brain detected on agent)
“A lot of guests parking” (This must be an L.A. rehab.)
Bring in the Clowns
“Buy now – beet rush” (Thank you for the vegetable update, potato head.)
“Central vacumme” (Perhaps you are describing your cranium?)
“This is a good by” (I suggest you say that to your career.)
“Don’t piss this one up” (That’s what I did in my pants when I read this.)
“You can’t top this house” (Have you tried calling a roofer?)
Now On The High Wire…
“Buy while interest is so low” (That’s doesn’t say much for your listing, pal.)
“Newly stagged” (Another divorce in Hollywood…)
“Nice valoo” (Is that served with chicken tandoori?)
“Tenant occupied, don’t get off in front yard” (Excuuuse me? Is this the home of Jenna Jameson?)
The Big Finale
Thanks to Kim for this Egregious Gaffe:
“VINAGE 18 units… Newr boiler porches… north of ravenswood brown line tain & short walk to river park, tuckpoint bsmt…
(Hello? Hellooo??? COME BACK – DON’T GO INTO THE LIGHT!!!)
I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.
Joe Loomer
August 19, 2011 at 5:25 am
Bwahahaha! "Tuckpoint?" You do NOT want to know what that had me thinking!
Navy Chief, Navy Pride
Tellis Coleman
August 19, 2011 at 10:41 am
Bwahahaha!Bwahahaha!and triple Bwahahaha!Bwahahaha!
I didn't think about "Tuckpoint" until you pointed out.
Nice!
Jason
August 21, 2011 at 10:59 am
Seriously? You have to know what tuckpointing is. Unless you never deal with brick or stone homes. If you're serious I suggest googling it.
jboy
August 19, 2011 at 9:26 am
What in the world!? This is ridiculous!!
Gwen Banta
August 19, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Joe, I couldn't even figure out what that agent was trying to say – help me here!
Gwen Banta
August 19, 2011 at 12:09 pm
Tellis, Joe – what is a tuckpoint? Now I have to know! C'mon, clue in the dumb girl!!!
Gwen Banta
August 19, 2011 at 12:12 pm
@jboy – Are you hip to "tuckpoint," also? I feel like the clueless kid on the playground with the toilet paper hanging out of my pants. Help!!!
jboy
August 23, 2011 at 9:05 pm
Gwen – You know I probably should be… but I'm not. I hope this isn't worse for me than it is for you!! 🙂