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Opinion Editorials

Need bruise clearance – MLS bloopers, Mike Tyson style


Friday’s Blooper Scooper picked up some beauties this week, friends. Some of these goofs are baffling! Thanks to Jane Peters for her great find. Spell well and sell well, folks!

Dubious Distinction

“New mane to street” (Hi-ho, Silver!)

“Furnished least by Oct 1” (Offered by We-Steal-Your-Stuff Realty) 

“Dome vacancies” (Is the dome that’s vacant the one attached to your neck?)

“Need bruise clearance” (Mike Tyson must be selling his crib.)

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“Duel indoor/outdoor fireplace” (Take ten steps, then draw your fireplace pokers.)

A Horse of A Different Color

“Waynescots in living room” (It seems Wayne sleeps around.)

“Big house – lack view” (Big idiots lack clarity.)

“Sage and sound balcony”  (Does this mean I can throw it in with my roast chicken?)

“Bad credit not a problem – ask ho” (The ho is probably more credible than you are.)

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“Lots of  jazmon” (Yeah, mon…nice ganja, too, eh?)

Happy Trails To You

“House lot of color and is high” (Obviously so is the agent.)

“Kiddies cutcakes”  (Adults cut cheese.)

“Seller will flinch floors” (He’s more likely to flinch at your spelling.)

“Backyard has multiple tourists” (Another case where a Hollywood bus tour veered off course!)

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Easy, Big Fella!

“Five minutes to Strip” (Five minutes to remove my high heel from your eyeball, you control freak.)

Written By

I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.

10 Comments

10 Comments

  1. Sheila Rasak

    September 30, 2011 at 2:33 pm

    I so love laughing my way toward another beautiful weekend on the California coast. This listing agent is presenting multiple offers on horse that's priced to cell and will even throw in the kitchen sink! wink wink

  2. Rachel LaMar, J.D.

    October 1, 2011 at 9:57 am

    Gwen,

    These are my favorite posts! I am a grammar and spelling fanatic, so I cringe when I see these things in the MLS. It never ceases to amaze me that agents do not proof things before clicking "submit." Please continue to keep these fun posts coming, as the laughter is so welcomed! I will have to send you bloopers I find out here with our San Diego MLS.

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