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Rub-a-dub, a cow in a tub… more MLS disasters

cow and tub
Usually I have to skip a week to gather enough material for my MLS blooper review, but this past week was especially rife with colorful errors and head-scratching misspellings.

I even caught a few in the L.A. Times and Homes and Land Magazine. It appears that some agents were dozing at their keyboards…or doing tequila shooters – you decide.

Here are my Picks of the Week:

Where’s the Beef?

“Vintage cow foot tub with gold feet” (Old beef with gold leaf.)

“Mobile nome for sale (A leprechaun on a Harley?)

“Lots of great chops in area” (‘Great’ accordin’ to Lizzie Borden.)

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“Lush landescaping”  (Drunk land on the lam?)

“Nice area of mountain w/ village inn iit” (Offered by the Village Inn-i-it.”)

“Fixer – New reduced size!” (Seems the clunker’s been shrunkered.)

Too Good To Be True

“Bonus to fix seller” (We pay to spay.)

“New lo-flow John” (John must be on Flomax.)

“Nice Hollywood bunglaboo” (Agent bungle in the Hollywood jungle…)

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“Work bintch thrown in for free” (The bintch should smack you upside your thick head.)

“Listen to the waves lapping in the arbor” (Run, you dud –there must be a flood!)

I Have a Bridge to Sell You…

“Many studio exes live in area” (Do the ‘exes’ in mind have axes to grind?)

“Small lake – great boasting” (Hmmm…I always heard bigger is better.)

“Celeb home – very she-she area” (Ellen and Portia must be selling their pad.)

“Nice yard with gazelbow” (Gesundheit!)

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“Railroad Thai steps lead to shore” (Bangkok River Dance, perhaps?)

“New cooper plumming.” (I think it’s “pooper plumbing.”)

And The Creativity Award Goes To:

“Nice master bedroom – Listen to the soothing sounds of the trains passing through while you sleep.”   (I just can’t top that!)

Written By

I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn,, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.



  1. Matt Stigliano

    April 30, 2010 at 10:57 am

    Wow Gwen, these might be the best yet.

  2. Jonathan Benya

    April 30, 2010 at 11:07 am

    I think you’ve surpassed yourself on this one!

  3. Greg Cooper

    April 30, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    I’m digging that Cooper plumbing.

  4. Gwen Banta

    April 30, 2010 at 2:06 pm

    Thank you, Matt – I owe it all to the misspellers and lousy typists out there. I’m one of them. I recently told another agent that my listing was in a “beautiful woofed area.” What a difference a ‘d’ would have made!

  5. Gwen Banta

    April 30, 2010 at 2:08 pm

    Thank you, Jonathan. Send me anything you find in beautiful Maryland.

  6. Gwen Banta

    April 30, 2010 at 2:11 pm

    I loved that one, too Greg. I often see “plumming,” but I recently saw “plubbing.” Now that’s original!

  7. Joe Loomer

    May 3, 2010 at 10:40 am

    Had to play catch-up after a surprise trip to Savannah this weekend – first I’ve gotten on a computer in three days (yay!). Great post Gwen! This is the way to start my day!

    Navy Chief, Navy Pride

  8. Gwen Banta

    May 3, 2010 at 7:58 pm

    Welcome back, Joe. Send me some new material from beautiful Georgia!

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