Quarantining, sheltering in place, staying home. We’re tired of hearing it; we’re tired of doing it. Yet, it’s what we still need to be doing to stay safe for a while longer. All of this can be lonesome. As the days turn into weeks and weeks into months, the alone time is getting to even the most introverted among us.
Solitary confinement is considered one of the most psychologically damaging punishments a human can endure. The New Yorker reported on this in a 1992 study of prisoners in detention camps in the former Yugoslavia, as well as Vietnam veterans who experienced isolation. These studies showed that prisoners who had experienced solitary confinement demonstrated similar brain activity to those who’d suffered a severe head injury, noting that “Without sustained social interaction, the human brain may become as impaired as one that has incurred a traumatic injury.”
We aren’t meant to be solitary creatures. Your “pandemic brain” is real. That fogginess, the lack of productivity, can be attributed to many things, including anxiety, but being kept apart from other humans is a big part of it too. Be kind to yourself, give yourself grace, and join others virtually. Be it an app, a class, a Facebook group, a chat room, or a livestream, someone somewhere is out there waiting to connect with you too.
The good news? We are lucky enough to live in an era of near limitless ways to interact socially online. Sure, it is different, but it is something. It’s important. The best thing about this type of social interaction is being able to hone in on your specific interests, though I’d caution you against getting caught in an online echo chamber. Diversity of interests, personality, and opinion make for a richer experience, with opportunities for connecting and expanding your worldview.
Here are a few suggestions on ways to socialize while staying home and staying safe. Communicating with other humans is good for you, physically and mentally.
Interactive Livestreams on Twitch:
Twitch is best known as a streaming service for video game fans, but it offers multiple streams appealing to different interests. This is more than passive watching (although that is an option, too) as Twitch livestream channels also have chat rooms. Twitch is fun for people who like multi-tasking because the chat rooms for popular livestream channels can get busy with chatter.
While people watch the Twitch hosts play a video game, film a live podcast, make music or art, mix cocktails, or dance, they can comment on what they’re watching, make suggestions, ask questions, crack jokes, and get to know each other (by Twitch handle, so it is still as anonymous as you want it to be) in the chat room. The best hosts take time every so often to interact directly with the chat room questions and comments.
Many Twitch channels develop loyal followers who get to know each other, thus forming communities. I have participated in the Alamo Drafthouse Master Pancake movie mocks a few times because they are fun and local to Austin, where I live. Plus, in my non-quarantine life, I would go to Master Pancake shows live sometimes. The chat room feels familiar in a nice way. While watching online is free, you can (and totally should) tip them.
Online trivia in real time:
There are some good options for real-time online trivia, but I’m impressed with the NYC Trivia League’s model. They have trivia games online on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Sundays. The NYC Trivia League seems to have figured out a good way to run the game live while keeping answers private from the other teams. They run games on Instagram Live with a live video of the host, and participants answer via the question feature. Clever!
Online book club:
First I have to shout out my Austin local independent bookstore, BookPeople, because they are fantastic. They run book clubs throughout the year, along with readings, book signings, and all things book-related. BookPeople hosts several online book clubs during these lockdown days, and most people will find something that appeals to them.
I’m also impressed with this list from Hugo House, a writer’s resource based out of Seattle. This list includes Instagram and Goodread book clubs, book clubs for Black women, rebels, and poetry lovers. The Financial Diet recommends the Reddit book club, if you are comfortable with the Reddit format. Please note that it’s a busy place, but if you like Reddit, you already know this.
Cooking class or virtual tasting:
This is doubly satisfying because you can follow these chefs in real time, and you end up with a meal. There are a couple on Instagram Live, such as The Culinistas or Chef Massimo Bottura.
You can also participate in virtual tastings for wine, whiskey, or chocolate, though you will have to buy the product to participate in the classes (usually held over Zoom or Facebook Live). If you are in Austin, Dallas, or Houston, I recommend BeenThere Locals. The cost of the course includes the wine, spirits, or cooking kit in most cases, and all of the money goes to the business and expert hosting the class.
Look for your favorite wine, spirits, cheese, chocolate makers, and chefs that are local to you to find a similar experience. Most either prepare the class kit for pickup or delivery within a local area.
Quarantine chat:
To interact with another quarantined person seeking social interaction, there’s Quarantine Chat. Quarantine chat is one of the ways to connect through the Dialup app, available on iOS and Android devices. Sign up to make and receive calls when you want to speak with someone. The Dialup app pairs you randomly with another person for a phone conversation, at a scheduled time, either with anyone or with someone with shared interests.
Quarantine chat takes it a step further with calls at random times. When your quarantine chat caller calls, you will not see their number (or they yours), only the “Quarantine Chat” caller ID. If you are unable to pick up when they call, they will be connected with someone else, so there is no pressure to answer. It’s nice to hear someone else’s voice, merely to talk about what you’ve been cooking or what hilarious thing your pet is doing.
Play Uno:
Uno Freak lets people set up games and play Uno online with friends or strangers. Players do not need to register or download anything to play. Uno Freak is web-based.
Talk to mental health professionals:
If your state of loneliness starts sliding toward depression, call someone you can speak to right away to talk over your concerns. When in doubt, call a trained professional! Here are a few resources:
- National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): The NAMI HelpLine can be reached Monday through Friday, 10 am–6 pm, ET, 800-950-NAMI (6264) or info@nami.org.
- Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to this text line 24/7 for someone to text with who will also be able to refer you to other resources: U.S. and Canada: 74174, U.K. 85258, Ireland: 50808.
- Psych Central has put together this comprehensive list of crisis intervention specialists and ways to contact them immediately.
There are many ways to connect even though we are physically apart. These are just a few real time ways to interact with others online. If you want something a little more flesh and blood, take a walk around the block or even sit in a chair in front of where you live.
Wave at people from afar, and remember that we have lots of brilliant doctors and scientists working on a way out of this. Hang in there, buddy. I’m rooting for you. I’m rooting for all of us.
Melissa Kruse
November 17, 2007 at 8:00 pm
Way to funny. Thanks for providing some humor on a gray Saturday. Of course I would expect nothing less from Colorado Springs best realtor.
Laurie Manny
November 17, 2007 at 8:03 pm
HA, I want some of what you have been nipping on.
ines
November 17, 2007 at 8:07 pm
Say “no to penguins” – I can see them doing Colorado Springs with the cold weather and all….but we also have plenty in our HOT climate.
Mariana
November 17, 2007 at 8:20 pm
I have decided (officially) that although real estate is no laughing matter, it provides some of the greatest humor in my life. And so do penguins.
monika
November 17, 2007 at 11:36 pm
I really enjoyed that Mariana…I needed a good laugh today!
Teresa Boardman
November 17, 2007 at 11:54 pm
Now wait a second . . I thought Realtors were held to a higher standard? . . .
Mariana
November 18, 2007 at 1:41 am
You know what Teresa? You ARE right! They ARE held to a higher standard, but I am sure you will agree that not ALL agents (penguins or otherwise) actually reach that standard …
Monika! Happy Penguin Day! (.. I just made that one up.)
Vicki Moore
November 18, 2007 at 1:52 am
Only a creatively strange mind could come up with that one. Completely awesome!
Todd Carpenter
November 18, 2007 at 7:54 am
Vicki, I’m sure Mariana’s mind is perfectly normal… at sea level. There’s not much air up here you know.
Laurie Manny
November 18, 2007 at 10:21 am
hahahahahaha, check this out:
https://www.metacafe.com/watch/64831/happy_feet_penguin_dance/
Todd Carpenter
November 18, 2007 at 10:34 am
I don’t know Laurie, I think this version relates better to the spirit of this post.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=NEYer85whfI&feature=related
ines
November 18, 2007 at 3:11 pm
Laurie and Todd, you guys are a trip!
Mariana
November 18, 2007 at 3:31 pm
Vicki – Todd may be onto something there …
Laurie and Todd – WOW! How did you get all that great footage from the recent NAR convention?!?!?
…very cool. 😉
Brian Wilson
November 19, 2007 at 9:46 pm
Does this include the Penguin a la “Batman Returns”?
https://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/warner_brothers/batman_returns/danny_devito/batman.jpg
Frankly, I think his hard-nosed business tactics and hypnotic umbrella would make him one of the finest Realtors we’ve seen, although his halitosis and butt-ugly face might count against him.
Brian Wilson, Zolve.com
Mariana
November 19, 2007 at 10:50 pm
Brian – Maybe he is the rest of the penguins’ managing broker?
Scoot
November 19, 2007 at 11:03 pm
Hello, my name is Scott, I’m a penguin, I have embraced the internet, I act almost the opposite of how you’ve describe my species, are you bashing my species? please send me the fish!
Mariana
November 19, 2007 at 11:31 pm
Hi Scott, and welcome to my post. I will email you a fish, as promised.
Am I bashing a whole species? No. Of course not. Just the penguin agents. 😉
Mariana
November 19, 2007 at 11:39 pm
Here You Go:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Rrbe7r6GV6o
Enjoy!
Scoot
November 20, 2007 at 12:10 am
I have to admit, I’m not really a penguin. I may have been guilty of making fun of a species myself. I just wanted the fish.
I don’t even know what a “penguin Realtor” is, again I just wanted the fish.
Thank you, that was a good fish!
Mariana
November 20, 2007 at 10:02 am
Yeah, I checked out your blog, and I think that you are most definitely NOT a penguin. (I noticed that you have opposable thumbs…)
Scoot
November 21, 2007 at 8:12 am
…]Last night I posed as a penguin.[…
Lisa Dunn
December 5, 2007 at 11:44 am
I have a nephew who will be very sad to see there is something penguins can’t do. He asked Santa for a pet penguin. Glad it wasn’t a pet realtor 🙂
Mariana
December 5, 2007 at 12:31 pm
Pet Realtor! Ha!
Pensacola Real Estate News
December 5, 2007 at 12:52 pm
I watched march of the Penguins the other night. I could clearly see that penguins would not make good realtors, but while watching the movie, somehow that thought never even crossed my mind. Kind of strange that I didn’t think of it. Not to mention they are pretty worthless at protecting their little ones, I can only imagine how bad they are at negotiating for their clients.
Mariana
December 16, 2007 at 8:43 pm
Karl – You know, March of the Penguins is a perfect PR video for my post …
Ann Cummings
December 16, 2007 at 9:33 pm
Hey Mariana – this was a hoot! I have to say I don’t get asked often at all why there aren’t more penguins in real estate, but when that first happens, I’m going to ingrain these reasons in my head…..just in case I do get asked that question! 😉
Hilarious!
Mariana
December 17, 2007 at 8:32 am
Ann! With all the snow you have been getting I am shocked that you haven’t gotten that question more often! 😉
Mariana
January 29, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Why is it that this post keeps “appearing” on other blogs … Is it magic? Or are there more penguin agents out there than I choose to believe?
Mariana
March 2, 2008 at 9:39 pm
[For as much as I am NOT a Penguin agent, sometimes I DO wish I lived among penguins … sliding around on my belly, eating fish and dodging sharks.]
Sue
July 10, 2008 at 8:01 pm
Mariana, you certainly have a good and very clever sense of humor. I actually did a “farming” card with penguins once….one penguin was asking the other if he knew of a good realtor and the other penguin had his “arm” pointing (like you’re guy above) and was saying “Yes, Sue went that way”. Thanks for the post!