This week’s MLS and real estate ads had a distinct odor, friends. From gas to dryrot, it seems homes are becoming offensive. Moral of this blog: You can’t sell it if you can smell it!
Something’s Rotten in the State of Denmark
“Gas not corrected” (Perhaps you should try Beano.)
“New deposit roof” (I suspect it’s crappy work.)
“There’s dry rot in eve” (News alert, Adam – you’re no Clooney yourself.)
“Nice crone molding” (Is the crone named Eve?)
“Rehabed bungalow in sa fpart of Venice” (‘Doubt it – most fparts are deadly.)
Celebrity Rehabbed
“Upstairs area uplifted.” (Hey guys – Pamela Anderson got a new set of who-whoos.)
“What a breaut!” (Said Clay Aiken while hanging Adam Lambert’s photo on his wall.)
“Call for affirmation” (Okay, Sally Field – I like you already!)
“Tub flew in from Italy.” (Welcome back, Roseanne.)
“Please do not handel the roses.” (No Chopin ‘em either?)
All Aboard the Titanic
“Plans drowned for new landscaping” (Methinks this one is sunk from the get-go.)
“Beautiful cabinets and fizzures” (Designed by San Andreas, I presume.)
“New lettucework and bar on patio” (Must be a salad bar)
“Newly upgrated” (Sounds pretty cheesy to me.)
Last Rites
“A home worth baaging” (Bag ‘em and tag ‘em – this listing was DOA.)
