Got Your Goat
“Let’s meet our goats together” (Sign on the meeting tent at Lost Shepherds Anonymous.)
“Georges house – open Sun” (When George steps out of the shower to the gasps of hoards of buyers – you’re toast, dude.)
“Check out our properties on Goggle” (This must be the new search engine for snorkeling Realtors.)
“Unieek floor planned” (…Not as unique as your language skills.)
“Law in back” (Meth lab in basement.)
Going to the Dogs
“Dog rub in back” (If I lift my paw, can I get a rub, too?)
“We antiseptic tenant move-out soon” (Do you give tenants a Karen Silkwood shower and then throw them to the curb?)
“Property line marked by popes” (Newsflash: The liquid on the fence is dog pee, not holy water, pal.)
“Good view in bedroom” (That explains why your neighbor is panting in your driveway.)
“Spot on carpet not blood” (And I suppose the chalk outline is art?)
Cat Got our Tongue?
“The house hasss.” (Just one more example why one shouldn’t type during a heroin nod.)
“Snax servd” (It must have been Alphabet soup…because someone ate a few of your letters.)
“Hysteric area” (Welcome to L.A.)
“Please subsacribe to our newslerrer” (I can hardly contain my enthusiasm.)
Enough Said
“This large hose will excite you” (Back off, buddy – Those with delusions wake up with contusions.)
That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell!
