So You Think You Can Dance?
“Call for adance showing” (I will if it’s the Chippendales.)
“New heat vince” (Yelled Tony “Two-Fingers” Tartaglia to Vince “The Vice” Vitangeli, who was furtively stashing a large bundle in the meat locker.)
“Boathouse with 2 ducks” (I’ve heard they’re squatters.)
“Donut distrub tenants” (Not as much your spelling “distrubs” me.)
“Turn R at Burger kling” (Then turn at my a_ _, because that’s where burgers “kling” to me.)
We Bought A Zoo
“Primate – subject to overbid” (Methinks you’re the monkey.)
“This is a doe house” (Bambi, we’ve found your mother.)
“Water bed strays” (That’s called a leak, pal.)
“Submit earl!” (Attention, Earl: Call on Line 1 from Dominatrix Didi.)
The Wizard of Odds
“Nice tree aviary” (Obviously an amenity in Kansas designed for tornado season.)
“Huge clothes in master” (Apparently Chris Christie is selling the N.J. Governor’s Mansion.)
“Geode available” (Spare rocks from your head, I presume?)
“Best regrats” (Ironically, those words are an appropriate send-off to your career.)
Make My Day
“Sweller needs rent-back” (I think a diuretic is more advisable.)
“New framing and shitrock” (Next time try a stool softener.)
“Knocker s broken” (And to think I complained because mine are sagging!)
That’s it for this week, folks. Remember to spell well and sell!
