What a week for bloopers! I know agents are worn out this time of year, but we all need to hit the spell check button or we may go down in infamy. Witness these blooper classics, friends:
Falling Behind?
“Nice butt needs work” (My ex said that just before his butt hit the curb.)
“Reel Estate Experts” (Oh yeah? Have you met my client, Moby Dick?)
“Bank needs alms length agreement” (I’ll expect alms from a bank the day Amelia Earhart crash lands on my patio.)
“Need roof export” (Call Auntie Em-n-Toto House “Sails.”)
“Hollywood Real Estale Listings” (Are they as stale as your dwindling career?)
Picking up the Rear?
“Will do irrigation and flushing” (Offered by Colonic Experts R Us.)
“New Sparkle Arrested” (Poor Sparkle – he’s that guy in the red stilettos who hustles on Sunset, right?)
“Thirty day closet” (Sparkle’s term at L.A. County Lockup, I presume?)
“New fliters” (Sparkle, it seems you have some competition…)
“MUST use packing lot across street” (…Said Paulie “Walnuts, while pointing his chain saw toward Satriales Pork Store.)
From One Bum to Another
“Ideal for live/wok” (I’d prefer to live in a deep fryer full of donuts, thank you.)
“No shuwings until open” (Good to know, Ed Sullivan.)
“Many privat school in neihborhood” (Have you considered enrolling?)
“Content included” (Let’s see how content you are when you pay that first mortgage payment…)
A Rough Ending…
“Ass for Margie” (That must be the inscription on your wife’s wedding band.)
“Call for your root removal” (Ouch – Lorena Bobbit is back in business!)
That’s it for this week. Spell to sell, folks!
