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Go Away!



(Note: this is off-topic, but something I wanted to share)


As you read this, I’m either travelling to, or sitting on, a beautiful beach in Zihuatanejo, Mexico (yes, as in The Shawshank Redemption).  So I thought I’d remind you that it’s good to get off the grid.  Seriously.  Not only is it good, it’s a necessity.


I learned this lesson from my father.  Seven years ago he announced his retirement to his agents by saying “after 12,474 days in the real estate business, it’s time for me to retire”.  Yes, I am proud to say I am the daughter of a career Real Estate Broker.  He was diligent about his vacation time, and took one week each quarter to refresh, relax and enjoy life.  This included during tough market cycles.  Throughout his 34 years in the business he experienced a number of them.  I clearly remember those times.     

No cell phone, no laptop, no internet? 

The whole idea of vacation is to BE on vacation.  Completely.  Life, and all its ups and downs will still be there upon my return.  If my house burns down, or a client has a problem I don’t need to know about it immediately.  Losing my few precious days away can’t change those things, plus my business partner is there to pick up the slack (although I don’t think she can do anything about a house fire).

Perhaps seeing that our business survived despite our absence means we don’t have to work quite as hard as we think. 

What if it all falls apart?

But what if you come back from vacation, look around and feel that you never should have left?  If so, the problem may not be the time you took off.  Forgoing a vacation won’t make a company more successful. And, if you work 15 hours a day and think the company’s survival is hinged on your putting in that many hours, you may be substituting time for intelligence.  Not only that but you put yourself at risk for burnout and will lose creativity and focus.   

Get.  Off.  The.  Grid.

A friendly reminder, your time off isn’t a luxury.  It’s necessary to thrive.  Your family will thank you.  Your co-workers/colleagues will thank you.  Your clients will thank you.  Most important, you will have something more memorable than the money you get from a close on escrow: memories.

Hasta la vista!

Brandie is an unapologetically candid marketing professional who was recently mentioned on BusinessWeek as a Top Young Female Entrepreneur. She recently co-founded consulting firm MarketingTBD. She's held senior level positions with GE and Fidelity, as well as with entrepreneurial start-ups. Raised by a real estate Broker, Brandie is passionate about real estate and is an avid investor. Follow her on Twitter.

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  1. Vicki Lloyd

    February 12, 2009 at 10:34 am

    I was in Zihuatanejo last spring where my daughter got married. Great place – beautiful beaches, friendly people, fantastic food! Have fun and enjoy your vacation!

  2. Brian Block

    February 12, 2009 at 10:39 am

    Getting away regularly is very important for health, sanity, and business. Enjoy your time in Mexico. I was just in Puerto Vallarta last month.

    It seems you’ve learned well from your father.

  3. Bob

    February 12, 2009 at 10:48 am

    I’m sure more than a few read this and think “Yea, right”. Vacation isn’t in the cards for a lot of people these days, but you can still get off the grid without needing a passport.

    For me, it’s coaching my two daughters. Once I show up on the field, my blackberry goes into hibernation. This time is ours, and unless there is something I know I have to deal with in advance that, if ignored, will lead to liability, then the BB doesn’t come out until the last out is made or practice is over.

    It is my release for stress, a time to spend with my kids that are memories they’ll have forever, and its fun.

    Getting off the grid need not be expensive nor even long term. But it does need to be done, especially if you have a family.

  4. Missy Caulk

    February 12, 2009 at 8:22 pm

    Good for me to read, as I am heading out for a long weekend with my husband to see our son in Norfolk. He is leaving on a 6 month tour.


  5. Paula Henry

    February 13, 2009 at 9:22 am

    Brandi – Sage advice I should take. I have never compleetly left my businesss behind and I can say the idea sounds great about now! Enjoy your vacation

  6. Brian Requarth

    February 15, 2009 at 6:40 pm

    Brandi, You couldn’t be more right. Taking time off, even if it is just for a short time is so important. Whether it’s spending time with the family or losing yourself on the beach in Mexico, we all need to recharge our battery once in awhile. I have noticed that when I take time off I always come back refreshed with new ideas. It breaths life back into you. Que tengas un buen viaje en Mexico!


  7. Danilo Bogdanovic

    February 16, 2009 at 7:47 pm

    You’re right on target! Once upon a time, I used to think I had to work all the time – sometimes 7 days a week. I was a grumpy, stressed out person (just ask my wife).

    Now, I take two 10 day vacations and several 3 to 5 day vacations every year. It keeps me feeling refreshed and sane and I’m more successful because of it. (And my wife is much happier with me)

  8. Lisa Sanderson

    February 16, 2009 at 8:38 pm

    I agree. It’s good to try for quarterly. I’ve been lax about this during the past year but will try to do better. Thx for the reminder.

  9. Brandie Young

    February 22, 2009 at 2:04 am

    Vicki – Thanks. I’m sure the wedding was spectacular! I did have fun. Thanks.

    Brian – good to hear from you. Thanks.

    Bob – Great points. Getting away can be in your own backyard – if you can stay away from the computer! It sounds like you have some great perspective. Thanks for sharing.

    Hi Missy – hope you enjoy your time with your son. I’m assuming by a “6 month tour” (and since the visit is in Norfolk) you mean he is a member of our Armed Forces. If so, I’m a fan, and am grateful for all he is doing for our country. I’m sure you are so proud.

    Paula – thank you. I hope you can take the leap and try it. Even if only for a few days. It works wonders.

    Brian – Gracias! Tuve un tiempo maravilloso en México!!!

    Danillo – Hola. Thanks for weighing in. Good point. Keeping your relationship at home healthy probably makes everything better.

    Lisa – Hi. I hope to hear about your vacation plans soon! Even if it’s a local weekend!

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The problem with a self-policing industry: you have to be a narc

Ethics violations in the real estate industry can make or break a Realtor’s career, depending on the severity, so it would stand to reason that all would be mindful of the rules, but there are always individuals in the field that act as if the Code of Ethics is irrelevant.



An animated discussion on ethics training

“Does anyone else find it ironic that NAR – the trade association for Realtors – has to mandate that members take an ethics class every four years?” An agent who attended one of my company’s broker opens yesterday posed that question to the wine and cheese grazing attendees. Of course, that opened up an animated discussion on the value of etchics training and the lack of enforcement when the rules are violated.

One agent volunteered that the guy sitting next to her in her last ethics class played games on his cell phone and then cheated during the test at the end of the class. Seriously, dude? You cannot even pay attention long enough to pass what should be the easiest test you’ll ever have to take in your career? Perhaps he was just seeing how far he could push it by cheating during an ethics test, to see if anyone else around him caught the extreme irony there. None of the other agents around him – including the agent he cheated off – turned him in and the instructor didn’t notice.

This same agent later called one of my sellers and tried to convince him to break a listing contract with me, because he had a “guaranteed buyer” in the wings. The seller was an attorney, and this bozo tried to get me cut out of the deal, offering the seller a reduced fee to dump me. The seller held firm and directed the agent to call me, then the seller called to let me know about the conversation.

“But you know if you file something the other agent will know.”

It gets better. After the deal closed, I requested paperwork from our local Board of Realtors to file an ethics complaint. The person in charge said, “But you know if you file something the other agent will know.” Gee. Really? I asked her to send the paperwork over anyway.

I called the seller/attorney and asked him to repeat the conversation to me, because I was documenting it to file a complaint. He turned wishy washy on me at that point and his story changed from “The other agent tried to get me to dump you as the listing agent to cut you out” to “Well he really only asked a few questions and I told him to call you. He probably didn’t mean any harm by it.” So there goes my star witness, who doesn’t want to rock the boat.

I didn’t file the complaint. I resorted to the “turn the blind eye but never trust the sleazeball again” path. And that is what happens to almost all ethics issues I hear about / see in person.

That’s what happens when you have a self-policing group of “professionals” who would rather not “narc” on a fellow agent. After all you’re probably going to end up on the other side of a deal from this guy some day, right? The guy in my example has sold two of my houses since that run-in. Why tick him off by filing a complaint and going through all that hassle? If he stops bringing buyers to my properties then my sellers ultimately lose, right?

Boiling down the CoE

The NAR Code of Ethics takes up pages and pages of tiny print, and it runs each year in their trade magazine (I think it’s the January issue). Does anybody read that? Probably not many. I’d argue none of us ever should have to read it again. Simply follow this advice instead. The thousands of words in the Code boil down to one thing: Do unto other agents, and consumers, and clients, what you would have them do unto you. It’s the Golden Rule. Simple. Well, obviously not, for many agents and brokers.

The sad part is the agent in my example had no clue how close I was to filing that compaint, and if he did know he’d probably scratch his head and wonder why his actions were “wrong.” Making us take a one-day class every few years won’t “make” the unethical agents suddenly operate ethically. Most of them just don’t get it.

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Ethics hearings in private a disservice to consumers?



Fight Club and real estate

For those of you that saw the movie ‘Fight Club’ you’ll remember that Rule #1 is “You do not talk about fight club,” followed closely by Rule #2, “You DO NOT talk about fight club.” Which, believe it or not, brings me to today’s topic: The Real Estate Code of Ethics and Arbitration. Article 17 obligates Realtors to resolve fights disputes with another Realtor through arbitration (not litigation). Arbitration is conducted at the local board level, and I am not aware of a local board that doesn’t require arbitration to be confidential.

I respect that public internecine warfare amongst Realtors isn’t in the interest of our industry, and doesn’t belong in the public spotlight. I’m not here to advocate the collective airing of our dirty laundry. That said, I wonder if our collective agreement to keep our concerns confidential can inadvertently harm the consumer and ultimately makes all of us look a little shoddier?

To find the first arbitration guidelines created by NAR and distributed as a set of suggested rules for boards to follow, we have to travel all the way back in time to 1929. NAR’s first Code of Ethics & Arbitration Manual wasn’t created until 1973, and it credited a 1965 California Association of Realtors version as its model.

Appalling conduct

I can think of two instances in the past year where I was so appalled by the conduct of a fellow Realtor that I went to the trouble to inquire about how to lodge a Code of Ethics complaint with my local board. After weighing the time required to make a competent complaint and comparing it with the best case outcome (a closed-to-the-public hearing in which they were found to have violated the code of ethics), I decided not to pursue a complaint in both cases. My association’s bylaws (and probably yours) give it the power to discipline any member based on the results of a Code of Ethics hearing, “provided that the discipline imposed is consistent with the discipline authorized by the Professional Standards Committee of the National Association of REALTORS® as set forth in the Code of Ethics and Arbitration Manual of the National Association.”

“Sanctioning Guidelines” – (Appendix VII of Part 4 of the 2011 manual for the very curious), guides member boards to impose disciplinary consequences that are progressive and fair, taking all considerations into account. Sample first-time disciplinary actions include suggestions of a letter of warning, a fine (amounts range from $200 to $5,000 depending on the severity of the violation), and attendance at relevant education sessions. Not to sound defeatist, but a confidential letter of warning and a fine of around $200 doesn’t seem like an outcome worth investing much of my time in.

Practicing in the internet era

Given that we live and work in the internet era, and review sites like Yelp abound, it seems a bit odd to me that a local board might know of an agent with problem behavior that is documented yet choose to make that information unavailable to consumers. My understanding is that the results of a code of ethics hearing are confidential with disclosure authorized in a few situations, none of which deal with informing the public.

Many of my fellow colleagues feel that the best response to a bad agent is to be patient and give them enough time to work themselves out of business. I can respect and understand their hands-off approach. But what about the damage that individual does to our industry as a whole? While we whisper, warn in confidence and know amongst ourselves how awful they are, the public doesn’t get the benefit of our perspective. Deprived of it, they turn to consumer review sites like Yelp.

How do you think we, as an industry, can help consumers in their quest to find a trustworthy agent?

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Realtors, we really need to get over ourselves already



A letter from the child of a Realtor.

Real estate now vs. 1987

In Real Estate, some things are always changing, like financing, education, laws, rules and technology. The two that will always remain constant, as long as they are within the law, are following our clients’ directions, and working with their best interests in mind.  I’m not sure we always follow through with this, though.

Some of us knowingly take over priced listings.  Some of us take listings that are out of our area of expertise.  Some of us won’t show short sales or REOs.  Some of us won’t show homes with low co-op splits.  Some of us don’t have Supra/e-Keys, and miss out on those listings entirely.

Putting our interests first

When these things occur we are putting our own interests first, not our clients’.  We may think that by having as many listings as possible is a good thing, that’s what we’re taught after all, isn’t it?  It may not matter that some are overpriced, eventually, whether one month or four months down the line, the price will be reduced.  It’s just a matter of time and money, for our clients, after all.  The same can be said when we take listings outside our area of expertise, just to add on to our inventory.  If we don’t know what we’re doing, on a short sale listing, for example, it will only cost our clients a lot of time and money.  A lot.

By eliminating certain houses our clients see, that may already fit their criteria, we’re taking away their choices.  Distressed sales account for close to 40% of the market.  This is probably higher in some local markets.  There is no legitimate way to ignore roughly 1/3 of the homes being sold.  Co-op fees are often a touchy subject, especially when they are, not “enough.”  If everyone utilized a Buyer Broker Agreement that stipulated what their fee was, the issue would take care of itself.  Not being able to access listings with the use of Supra/e-Keys is a choice.   Choosing not purchase one will mean agents will not be able to access Fannie Mae (and eventually, probably additional Gov REO homes) along with the listings that are already using them.

Our priorities versus theirs

We totally need to get over ourselves already.  We are not bigger than our clients.  Our priorities are not more important than theirs when it comes to the actual listing and selling of homes.

Recently, my awesome parents dug through a few boxes and rounded up one of my first art projects. About 25 years ago I did the poster featured above about my Mom, and her Real Estate career.  It was for an Open House (no pun, honest!!!) for the elementary school where I attended first grade.  It was just, what she did according to me way back then.  Things are way more complicated now, than when I was six.  There’s a heck of a lot more paperwork for one.  But the same basic principle still applies.

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