Up and Down
“Big Trampauline strays” (Pauline may be a big tramp who runs around, but you’re a moron.)
“Low cots to buyers” (Sales pitch to Snow White and her small statured friends.)
“Remove shoes as flavor” (Ah, that Odor Eater taste is such a fine accent to any soup!)
“Please concern appointment” (Of greater concern is your spelling…)
“No credit for closeting” (Apparently this seller lives in West Hollywood.)
Side to Side
“Al plumbing removed” (Poor Al – that had to hurt.)
“New ho me” (Your professional goals are a bit underwhelming.)
“Frosted gass” (Yeah, frozen beans are hard to digest.)
“Laundry on sight” (First you’re staring at lingerie on a clothes line, then the next thing you know, you’re wearing it , dude.)
“Beautiful stem room” (This must be the room where the Rockettes rehearse.)
Back and Forth
“A home for the ageless” (Now that Dick Clark is dead, that limits your buyer pool to Bon Jovi, Dorian Gray, and Mickey Mouse.)
“Decorrative shurrers” (It’s a bitch when the caffeine wears off, isn’t it?)
“All repares have been fixed” (I can suggest a few things that still need work…)
“Extra acheridge for sale” (Isn’t that the historic site of the Battle of Arthritic Knee?)
Over and Out
“Bend over offers” (Bend over and kiss your career good-bye.)
That’s it for this week, folks. remember: Spell well and sell.
