My Life as an Addict

I admit I’m an addict. I can’t go a day without it. I have anxiety when I go without it for too long. I generally only stop when I sleep.

There is a reason the public refers to it as the ‘Crackberry’.

In The Beginning

In my early sales career, I was one of the last to hang on to the Beeper. “Who wants to be constantly accessible,” I argued. I wasn’t a doctor!  But at that time my territory was the city of San Francisco. Having been stuck in traffic one too many times, I finally caved to the pressure and got my first cell phone. Life as I knew it was over.

The Progression

Over the years it became more and more important to me. Email, texting, phone calls, internet – all in that small device that I could take anywhere. I become more reliant on it.  Now, I hardly ever leave a room without it – let alone the house. It’s one of the surefire reason to turn the car around.

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I’ve set rules for myself. I don’t answer it during meals. I don’t look at it when I am picking up or dropping off my kids at school. And no business after 7:30 at night.  But I admit, I fall off the wagon sometimes.

The Incident

Last Thursday morning, I had clients in town and I had a day of showing property ahead of me. The day was plotted with diligence and efficiency and I was more than prepared. As we began to load my vehicle, the client shared with me that they had decided about 50% of the properties were not necessary to look at. What is that saying…the best laid plans…

I placed my Crackberry on the front of the car as I quickly scramble through my listings to rearrange our day, a little flustered at first, but flexible. Off we went.

Couple miles later, I noticed something fly off the hood of the car. Being focused on the conversation, I initially didn’t think too much about it. But soon after, with a sinking feeling and a small rush of anxiety, I realized it would likely be some time before my next fix.

Quitting Without 12 Steps

I was forced to go cold turkey. That first day was challenging. No emails. No text messages. No phone calls.  I felt disconnected, separated.

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But suddenly, I had visions of a potential new high – the new 3G iPhone. Just the thought of it was thrilling.

I came home and told my husband about the incident and the visions of the new phone in my future. He told me not to worry – the Crackberry was insured! Oh.

It’s been nearly 4 full days without my phone. I’ve had moments of frustration and I’m sure a delay in responding to people. But it’s been rather freeing. Everyday seems a little easier than the last. Today, my new phone should arrive UPS and feelings are mixed.

Passing on the Addiction

My son finished elementary school last week. (Brag moment – he received a President’s Scholastic Achievement Award and was one of a few to receive a Citizenship Award. I sat in the audience and responded as if I had just won an Oscar.) He’s been complaining that he’s the only one without a cell phone – although I highly doubt he’s the only one. I’d been denying him this ‘privilege’ but after the award ceremony, I caved.

Yesterday, he got his own cell phone. Already, he’s begun carrying it everywhere he goes. I shake my head knowing that the lifelong addiction has just begun.

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