Sunday, December 21, 2025

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Why Now?

AG Pro gives you sharp insights, compelling stories, and weekly mind fuel without the fluff. Think of it as your brain’s secret weapon – and our way to keep doing what we do best: cutting the BS and giving you INDEPENDENT real talk that moves the needle.

Limited time offer: $29/yr (regularly $149)
✔ Full access to all stories and 20 years of analysis
✔ Long-form exclusives and sharp strategy guides
✔ Weekly curated breakdowns sent to your inbox

We accept all major credit cards.

Pro

/ once per week

Get everything, no strings.

AG-curious? Get the full-access version, just on a week-to-week basis.
• Unlimited access, no lockouts
• Full Premium archive access
• Inbox delivery + curated digests
• Stop anytime, no hoops

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Get your fill of no-BS brilliance.

Pro

/ once per year

All in, all year. Zero lockouts.

The best deal - full access, your way. No timeouts, no limits, no regrets.
A year for less than a month of Hulu+
• Unlimited access to every story
• Re-read anything, anytime
• Inbox drop + curated roundups

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*Most Popular

Full access, no pressure. Just power.

Free
/ limited

Useful, just not unlimited.

You’ll still get the goods - just not the goodest, freshest goods. You’ll get:
• Weekly email recaps + curation
• 24-hour access to all new content
• No archive. No re-reads

Free

Upgrade later -
we’ll be here!

Unlock AG Pro Today

Why Now?

AG Pro gives you sharp insights, compelling stories, and weekly mind fuel without the fluff. Think of it as your brain’s secret weapon – and our way to keep doing what we do best: cutting the BS and giving you INDEPENDENT real talk that moves the needle.

Limited time offer: $29/yr (regularly $149)
✔ Full access to all stories and 20 years of analysis
✔ Long-form exclusives and sharp strategy guides
✔ Weekly curated breakdowns sent to your inbox

We accept all major credit cards.

Pro

/ once per week

Get everything, no strings.

AG-curious? Get the full-access version, just on a week-to-week basis.
• Unlimited access, no lockouts
• Full Premium archive access
• Inbox delivery + curated digests
• Stop anytime, no hoops

$
7
$
0

Get your fill of no-BS brilliance.

Pro

/ once per year

All in, all year. Zero lockouts.

The best deal - full access, your way. No timeouts, no limits, no regrets.
A year for less than a month of Hulu+
• Unlimited access to every story
• Re-read anything, anytime
• Inbox drop + curated roundups

$
29
$
0

*Most Popular

Full access, no pressure. Just power.

Free
/ limited

Useful, just not unlimited.

You’ll still get the goods - just not the goodest, freshest goods. You’ll get:
• Weekly email recaps + curation
• 24-hour access to all new content
• No archive. No re-reads

Free

Upgrade later -
we’ll be here!

Text Magic, get any service or product delivered effortlessly, magically!

Magic puts us one step closer to a full Jetson-ization of our culture

My generation will either go down in history as A) The most innovative and inventive generation mankind has seen to date, or B) The bar-none zero-competition most lethargic pile of bodies ever to call themselves humans.

By the time I turn 40, I expect there to be an artificial intelligence for anything and everything. From a Roomba that ties my shoes to a coat rack that tells me that I’m not too old to sport a letterman jacket, robots are going to be running things.

This puzzlingly awesome service, aptly titled “Magic,” connects you to an invisible delivery elf that works at every store you can think of. All you have to do is text the magic word (hint: it’s magic. The word is literally “magic.”) to the company’s main line, and the wizard responds in an instant.


Are you put off by the idea of having to put on actual pants in order to grocery shop? Well, if you’re above taking the sweatpants/socks/sandals route that so many of us wind up defaulting into, kick back and let someone else run your errands for you. That’s right, you lazy bum. You can just text your grocery list to this magic number and the items will be delivered to your doorstep.

It’s not free, but for some, it will so be worth it

Now, just like any delivery service, there is a nominal fee involved. Although it’s not explicitly stated or advertised anywhere, it’s been estimated to hover around the 10 percent range. Picture it like a tip for the pizza guy.

But this is no normal pizza guy. This is like a personal assistant. Magic can book your flight, send flowers to your mom because you somehow forgot her birthday, buy you front row tickets to the Harlem Globetrotters, or schedule you for a haircut (yeah, you need one).

But it’s MAGIC

Guys, I understand that there is an actual operator on the other side of my screen who is making this stuff happen. And I understand that it might be a bit more expensive than doing it myself (isn’t everything?). But the service is called Magic, and there’s a certain allure to that. And if you’re comfy enough on a rainy day, you certainly don’t want to go pick up the pancake mix we both know you want to use for dinner. Text “MAGIC” to 83489 and thank me later.

Or have Magic do it for you.

#GetMagic

 

Johnny Crowderhttps://instagram.com/johnnycrowder
Staff Writer, Johnny Crowder, is a hard working creative with a Bachelor's Degree in Psychology and a deep passion for writing. In his other life, he is the front man for signed metal band, Dark Sermon. He has a wicked sense of humor and might literally die if he goes a day without putting pen to paper.

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