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You can’t put lipstick on a marketing blooper

August 28, 2013

marketing blooper

Marketing blooper reel

It’s Blooper Day again folks, and I found everything from an boozes to bruises in the MLS and other real estate advertisements. Some of these gaffes were hard to decipher, but they were all darn funny. Enjoy:

 Yes Siree, Bob

“Pet splay area” (Kick-yo’-ass Alert: I just gave PETA your number, Jack.)

“Enjoy the wide ope skies” (Said Andy when he threw Ope out of a helicopter. Or am I mixing up my TV shows?)

“Turn after bride” (Yeah, yeah – that’s the usual bedroom complaint…from grooms who have stopped changing their knickers.)

“Porsche swing inc” (How long does it take to go from zero to sixty?)

“Sunken tux” (Well, that’s one way to sober up boss daddy.)

Maybe, Baby

“Bing the kids to see the poppies” (Why bother – it’s obvious you’ve already smoked them.)

“For those with destructive taste” (Is this an open house or an ad for A-Rod’s new line of Superstar Steroids?)

“Drawing for 2 new iPass” (Hmmm…I guess we’re now doing colon surgery in cyberspace.)

“Please be on tim” (If Tim’s hot, I’m happy to oblige.)

“This is the last house your buyers will want” (Said the last agent a seller would want.)

No, No, Nanette

“No electric sin” (Either you’re referring to the leg lamp in the window in A Christmas Story, or the adult toy shop is low on stock.)

“No butt on lawn” (Don’t worry, he was hauled away after I divorced him.

“See are new marketing materials” (Something tells me I’m about to be underwhelmed.)

“This toilet actually talks!” (Can it say, “Unless you’re wearing fur shorts, you need to shave that thing!”?)

Bye Bye, Blackbird (Blooper of the Week)

“Please have your clients induce themselves” (…Oozed the administrator for Blue Cross HMO as she passed out toe tags.)

That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell!

I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn,, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.


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