Often I am asked why there are not more penguins in the business of real estate – here in North America. Although it may not seem obvious to everyone, there are really good reasons why a potential Buyer or Seller would not hire a penguin as their next Realtor®.
Reason #1:
Penguins do not have the patience to deal with the random phone calls that other Realtors® have to professionally deal with on a daily basis. Penguins have a very short temper and have been known to actually throw phones through windows when non-committed, uneducated callers refuse to listen to logic. However, on the flip side, there ARE the penguins who jump at every call, but then have no time for their actual
clients. Neither scenario is good.
Reason #2:
Penguins believe that the Internet is a fad and refuse to make their presence here. (I know this because I guarantee that NO penguin will log on and actually dispute me. So, if you are a penguin, and you have embraced the internet as a tool in your business, please speak up … I’ll even email you a fish if you leave a comment here.) Do they not believe that over 80% of all home searches start online? Oh well …
Reason #3:
Penguins believe in a strict dress code. Personally, I believe that it is important to dress nicely for your clients, but that definition of “nice” differs from agent to agent and client to client. Penguins refuse to think of real estate as anything but a Black Tie affair. Ugh … please!
Reason #4:
Penguins never return phone calls. Maybe it is their lack of opposable thumbs. Maybe it has something to do with just thinking they are better than everyone. Maybe I could just make up excuses for this irreprehensible behavior all day long…. Regardless of WHY they never return phone calls, the fact is that they do not. This shows a complete lack of professionalism and there really is no excuse.
Reason #5:
Penguins are just way too selfish and self-centered.
I once witnessed a penguin at a local coffee shop making a complete ass out of itself. Who would hire someone like that? Nobody is THAT important…
So, if you were considering hiring a penguin as your next Realtor® please think through all these repercussions.
Anyway, if real estate really is a people-business, I guess penguins have no place in it anyway.
