“Weeping grounds” and other ad bloopers to cry about

Waterlogged

“Overlooks the rezervwa”  (This must be a body of water in Poland.)

“This house will speak to you” (Not anymore – I take drugs for that.)

“No feet!” (And yet you’ve done such a fine job of running amuck…)

“Please don’t crawl after 8 pm” (Well that sure puts a crimp in my Happy Hour.)

“View of the jedi” (“May the Force be with you.” You’ll need it.)

Watered Down

“Low escrow fees, no patting” (No patting? I guess that “friendly uncle” routine finally bit you in the ass.)

“We have old record.” (Felony “patting,” I presume?)

“Barn and large chicken glop” (Hmmm…’seems like you need a large chicken bidet.)

“Townhouse stile” (Put down your bong – it’s not the house that’s spinning.)

Water Works

“Weeping grounds” (It’s no surprise your seller is shedding tears.)

“Supremes time taking work” (Offered By Motown Realty. Their motto: “You Can’t Hurry Love.”)

“Turkey penthouse” (For upwardly mobile Butterballs.)

“Hurry before school beacons” (Methinks there’s no light at the end of your tunnel.)

Fire Water

“Bluepints for addition” (If green pints are for the Irish on St. Patrick’s Day, then are blue pints for little drunken muppets on Cookie Monster Day?)

“Speed hump area” (We must be dating the same guy.)

That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: spell well and sell!