Words of inspiration
– Norman Vincent Peale
Peale had it going on. His personal philosophy here may be a bit watered down, but he knew that in order to be liked you need to give more than you receive. And not because you have to but because you want to. People may be liked for different reasons, but generosity is king.
Be generous with your time, your interests and your curiosity and stand back!
Being likeable in the connection economy
Seth Goodin takes this step and builds on it. He calls the world in which we function the “connection economy.” In this dynamic everything we do begets something more. The connection economy, comments Seth, continues to gain traction because connections scale, information begets more information, and influence accrues to those who create this abundance.
“As connections scale, these connections paradoxically make it easier for others to connect as well, because anyone with talent or passion can leverage the networks created by connection to increase her impact. The connection economy doesn’t create jobs where we get picked and then get paid; the connection economy builds opportunities for us to connect, and then demands that we pick ourselves.”
Friends bring us more friends. A reputation brings us a chance to build a better reputation. Access to information encourages us to seek ever more information.
The connections in our life multiply and increase in value.
According to Goodin, thriving in the connection economy is based on one important principle: Getting people to like you. People who like you will support your ideas, buy your product, hire your services, introduce you to their friends, and go out of their way to make your life better.
Out with the old
The thing is, and maybe this is how the generations evolve over time, our need to be likeable 50 years ago is apparently a lot different than why we need to be liked in the here and now.
I enjoy knowing I am liked because it makes me feel good and is a by-product of doing good things. But (at least from a business perspective), doing a good job for a fair price is no longer sufficient to guarantee success! Good work is easier to find than ever before.
What matters now, say the new entrepreneurs (a great name for a TV show by the way), is trust, permission, remark-ability, leadership, and humanity (and its subsets: connection, compassion, and humility).
These are human qualities and demonstrated with a minimum of sincerity will always lead to big things.
That said, what so many don’t realize is that the secret to building relationships isn’t in the words you say, but in the questions you ask!