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New Year’s Resolutions




10. I will always work with a buyer/broker agreement.
9.   I will maintain my local blog as local and not stray into unacceptable territory just for the sake of my buddies.
8.   I will prospect daily no matter how sick of it I get.
7.   I will consistently call leads no matter how mean, nasty and rude they are.
6.   I will listen to the advice of others.
5.   I will wait until I hang up before I call people names.
4.   I will not take offense to offensive blog comments.
3.   I will say no nicely.
2.   I will not sleep on the couch with my laptop.
And my number 1 real estate new year’s resolution…I will install a taximeter in my vehicle for those who buyers who just want to look.

As a lifelong resident and local Realtor, Vicki has established herself as a respected member of the San Mateo County real estate community. She’s known for her wit, sarcasm, and her personality that shows through in her posts. You can find her spouting off at Twitter, here at ag, and her personal blog, San Mateo Real Estate

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  1. Todd Carpenter

    December 28, 2007 at 10:59 pm

    Instead of waiting to call people names, I just smile and flip off the phone.

  2. Larry Yatkowsky

    December 29, 2007 at 1:31 am

    In lieu of the taximeter, go green and ride a scooter. 🙂

  3. Vicki Moore

    December 29, 2007 at 8:06 am

    I’ve had a few “ooops” where I accidentally didn’t wait until the phone was hung up.

    A scooter. Now that’s an idea. I could get a trailer to haul my clients in. I’d need extra helmets, but I’d save money on gas. Hmmm.

  4. Chris Lengquist

    December 29, 2007 at 4:35 pm

    I seldom call people names before hanging up the phone. But I think they can tell by the sound of the receiver slamming up against my desk or wall. 🙂

  5. Mariana

    December 29, 2007 at 4:47 pm

    Vicki – The scooter idea is a great one, but forego the trailer. Running alongside the scootering real estate agent to look at homes is a better idea for looky loos.

  6. Larry Yatkowsky

    December 29, 2007 at 9:27 pm

    The go-green-scooter comes with a no-option pre-qualification package of 3 rusty skateboards and used water-skiing ropes. Towed behind the go-green-scooter, the “i love you and will work with you pre-qualification rating” starts adding up with each home viewed on the fly-by. If the lookies make it to the fifth home bring out the bic pen, the contract and starbucks. Corners, downhill roads or a combo, gives the lookies added bonus points and lets them sign without further coaching. These folks are keepers. 🙂

  7. Vicki Moore

    December 29, 2007 at 10:13 pm

    Chris – Too funny. I told a telemarketer the other day that I was going to break his eardrum by slamming the phone on the desk he didn’t hang up first.

    Larry – I don’t know what to say to you. Your humor is far beyond what I can come up with. You’re a creative nut.

    Mariana – Any time I can encourage you, I count that as a day done well.

  8. Larry Yatkowsky

    December 29, 2007 at 10:53 pm


    “I’d need extra helmets”

    Not so, I forgot to point out that NO HELMUTS means an extra 10 pre-qualification points for the lookies. 🙂

  9. Paula

    December 31, 2007 at 11:38 pm

    Here, here! Vicki – you have hit on some #1 resolutions for many – love the taximeter!:)

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Funny video most real estate professionals can relate to



Have you ever had a buyer that was so enthusiastic about their potential home that they have a list a mile long of requirements? The front door must face east, the windows must be Pella brand, the carpet must be cut pile berber, it must be within two lots of a fire hydrant, needs to have wooden rods in the closet, not metal and of course the exterior paint must be barn red.

You already know what home they need and will love based on their actual needs and you’re going to show them that house, but in the meantime you may end up feeling a bit like the character in this video that is just so funny, we can all relate to (whether about a buyer or otherwise):

Can you relate? Maybe in a former career or if you’re one of our readers that is a designer first and foremost?

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Funniest Realtor parody videos you’ll see all minute, guaranteed!



Who says the phenomenon of funny cat videos and stupid girl falling in a fountain while texting at the mall videos don’t spill over into the real estate world? We’ve highlighted three hilarious real estate videos below that are well worth the ten minutes to watch, even if you’re in the office and have to put headphones on.

Video 1:… the best part is at 2:29… MOVE!

Video 2: I Love You, Man… the best part is the whole clip. If you haven’t seen this horribly inappropriate movie, the lead character is a Realtor. He is awesome.

Video 3: Realtor loves his job. Or something… the best part is at 0:39. Is that the fireplace over there!?

Tell us in comments which video moment caught your eye!

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Business Marketing

A pig and a poke (The MLS “Menu”)



This week I actually got hungry reading the MLS and the LA Times real estate ads. Check out these bloopers so you can see what’s currently on the menu. I must warn you, you may want to hit the sauce and trim the fat:

I’m In the Mood For Food 

“This hame is well stocked.” (Thank you, Porky Pig.) 

“Hear is the glolden egg!” (…Which apparently comes scrambled.) 

“Counter w/ new pop and fresh” ( Fat little dough boy included.)

“This one has alla the gravy” (Said Carmella Soprano as she proudly served her baked ziti.)

“You’ll marble when you see this beauty” (Bummer. At least Lot’s wife got to be a condiment.)

“We hamdle REOs” (That’s one way to bring home the bacon.) 

Ham Fingers…So The Pork Lingers                                            

“Small pad w/ view of peer” (Why go home when you can sleep at the office?) 

“This is not a TIC” (…said Jeff Goldblum’s  hands.) 

“This pad in the Hollywood Hills is phat.” (So is your head, Biggie Smalls.) 

“Cabinets w/ polished mental inserts” (Listing w/ punch drunk mental idiot.)

“This is a Short Shale” (Say that five times really fast.) 

Is It Happy hour Yet? 

“Just done finished floored” (Bottle done, finished agent on floor.) 

“Cork floors in bar aria” (Methinks the cork was popped several drinks ago.) 

“Stunning hammerred doors” (Offered by stumbling hammered dufus.) 

“This condonimiun has all the trimmins” (Sauced agent has the tremorrrrs.) 


“Bask in the warm sin by the pool” (Yay – party at Charlie Sheen’s  pad!)

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