“Subourbon area” and other marketing bloopers on the rocks

Read ’em and weep:

 All -tered State

“New copboards thruout” (Let me guess – they can store a lot of donuts?)

“Access to amnesties -need membership” (Aerial leaflets dropped by mystery red-white-and-blue planes seen flying over Moscow.)

“Small Jim included” (I think they prefer to be called “little people.”)

“Visit beautiful Fleur de Flys”  (Hence the maggots in your hair.)

“Seller dead – can’t be repaired” (Ergo the term dead, wiz-kid.)

All -But-The-Kitchen-Sink

“New sick in kitchen” (I see you’ve experienced one of my dinner parties.)

“Check out my pot” (I just thought you were packing a lift raft in your pants..)

“Jets removed from spa” (Who annihilated them  – the Patriots?)

“Stacked Unise” (Ah yes… Unise from Silicone Valley.)

“Mucis throughout” (Said Julius Caesar as he entered  Et Tu Gagatorium.)

All -Fired Up

“Harry won’t last” (Well, now that there’s Viagra he might…)

“Extrerior repairs maid” ( Can she repair your spelling?)

“Fooundation is sipping” (I’m sipping, too, but I can spell even when I’m dunk. Uh, drunk.)

“Beautiful subourbon area” (That’s how I lovingly refer to my shot glass.)

“Gentile wear” (Sign in back alcove of Morie’s Haberdashery and Herring Emporium.)

All -Time Best:

“This is a hard on to find” (And here I thought you were just happy to see me!)

That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell!