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Opinion Editorials

Rub-a-dub flub: real estate listing belly flops

Without editing, the multiple listing service can often read like a bad joke filled with inane errors. All we can do is laugh together and learn together. Spell safely, my friends.


All I can say is, “Ouch!” Some of these flubs should be etched on the tombstones of the perpetrators. Imagine these bloopers on headstones:

And Here I Lie… 

“Loin has been removed” ( Bragged Tony “The Eviscerator” Tartaglia before catching a flight back to Jersey.)

“Alaroundeck furniture” (Alaround senseless…but funny.)

“Widow boxes add charm” (How charming can one be when stuffed in a box?)

“Hurry, this is lost one” (“David Livingstone, I presume?”)

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And No Wonder I’m Dead…

“Come from N to avoid confession” (And then go straight to Hell in a hand basket…)

“This is high over all others” (You must be referring to Don King’s hair.)

“Lots of wilt life in area” (I suspect you’re referring to Happy Trails Retirement Village.)

“New  cHeating system” (Let me guess – banks foreclosing on the hapless  in order to get bailout money?)

“Guaranteed to fat your budget” (Is that what you used to fatten your head?)

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For the Brain I was Given, Was Nothing But Lead

“Lead in sales” (Chapter 1 – Why I Drink So Much – from The 2011 Agent Book of Laments.)

“Seller wants clothes” (No cross-dresser is squeezing his  hairy corpus into my high heels!)

“You can’t pass this” (Said the doctor to the guy with the twenty-five pound kidney stone.)

“Number wan  pririority” (Reason #1 not to talk while flossing.)

“Hoing fast” (Isn’t he the mayor of Chinatown?)

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Flub of the Week

“Access rumps” (Oh dear Lord, don’t even get me started!)

That’s it for this week, folks – spell and sell!

Written By

I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.

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