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Real Estate Karaoke at the Redhead Lounge

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In case you missed all the fun, last week I hosted a virtual real estate discussion in the Redhead Lounge. This second installment includes the same illustrious crew: Brandie Young, Ken Brand and Paula Henry, as well as two party crashers, Joe Loomer and Tanya Nouwens. These leaders in marketing and real estate were asked to answer questions in ten words or less, in between karaoke numbers and shooters. Grant Hammond, the bouncer on duty, had his work cut out for him. They have imparted some great words of wisdom, but watch what happens when I ply them with booze and become the master puppeteer!

 GBB: Hey guys, who’s buying? KB: Loomer is. Here’s his wallet – I moonlight as a pickpocket.  Paula provided a distraction by slapping Joe upside his head. GBB: Speaking of team work…do y’all think it’s advisable to have a business partner? KB: Everyone should have a trusted working partner.  Someone who can cover their business….  Most don’t need a partner/split … I’ve rarely seen a partnership work, except with spouses. PH: Yeah, long term business relationships rarely last. GBB: Two words: Bill and Hillary.  JL: That’s three words in Georgia. BY: I love having a partner…each of us morphs naturally into a role with the client, with one being the one that must, at times, bring some order to the relationship…GBB: Brandie,  I’m not sure anyone will bring you to order if you don’t slow down on those margaritas. BY:You’re right – the salt is giving me kankles. JL:What in the hell are kankles? Do we need to call an exterminator? BY: Bloated ankles, dufus. Get your hand off my Swedish meatballs… JL: I will if you will.

GBB: Come to order, delinquents. Hey, look who just walked in – Tanya Nouwens. You’re late, put a buck in my money jar. TN: But I drove in from Canada… GBB:Hey, there will be no cryin’ for you Argentina. Try driving across Los Angeles! So give us some advice, Tanya: Should agents who are resistant to texting start doing so? TN: Yes, because it makes us seem 10 years younger than we really are.  And it’s way less expensive than cosmetic surgery. GH:Did you say sexting? Hell yes! GBB: Grant, stop stalking us and go back to your post at the door. PH: Clients who text expect to be answered in the same manner; besides it’s quick and efficient. GBB: So you ladies think we need to be technologically current…  I carry a Smith and Wesson – does that count?

GBB: What is the most important quality about a house?  JL: If the bar is stocked.  Oh, you mean buying one? The honesty in the disclosure statement and the state of repair. PH: Location. Duh. Now stop bothering me. I’m warming up my pipes for my real estate karaoke song. I plan to rock the joint with “Our House.” GBB: Did you say “Outhouse?”  You’re slurring. You’ll be rockin’ with only two stumps if you touch my money jar again. KB: Whatever my clients think is most important about a house is most important to me. GBB: Good answer, Ken, but I didn’t ask you, so put a buck in the jar. And what’s your real estate karaoke song, tonight?” KB: Brandie and I are doing a duet of “Sugar Shack.” JL:Ken, you’re making a bold assumption that Brandie can walk on those meadow muffins that are squeezing out of her shoes. Gwen, shoot her in the kankles before she lifts off!

GBB:  Ken, while you buy another round with Joe’s money, maybe Tanya can tell us what issue worries her clients the most. Tanya? TN: That they won’t get the value out of their property that they have already attributed to it based on a scientific study consisting of talking with their neighbors and friends and consulting Uncle Edward who used to sell real estate in the area in 1958. PH: Boy, you’re a chatty l’il thing…but I agree. They are concerned about whether or not they’re paying or receiving the best price. GBB: So we all agree on something? JL: My clients also worry about inspections…and the smells emanating from garage freezers. GBB:Zip it, Loomer. 

GBB: What troubles you the most about the loan process? BY: There’s no rigor.  The underwriters have way too much power.  The lenders are still in panic mode. KB: You’d be in panic mode, too, if you could see your kankles from where I’m sitting! BY: Don’t make me hurt you, Ken. GBB: Joe, any loan process woes? JL: Buyers who arrive “pre-qualified” by internet or out of town lenders. Gwen, let’s team up for “House of the Rising Sun.”  GBB:  No, you’ll hog the microphone. KB: If you don’t pre-prepare your clients for the often bumpy and anger inspiring process in getting a loan, you’ll get blamed… GBB:  That’s why I pack a Smith and Wesson. 

GBB: Okay, here is my rapid fire finale: Ken, wake up – your ankle monitor is beeping! What musical instrument would most help you in real estate?  KB: If I had the Pied Piper’s magic flute, that’d be cool. GBB: Brandie, when is dress important? BY: Always.  Ladies!  The two most important things: manicured nails and shoes that are not destroyed.  It’s the little things. JL: Unlike your ankles… GBB: Brandie, I don’t think Joe can breathe with your IPhone in his esophagus. Paula, you’re on deck with “Homeward Bound,” but before your vocals shatter the neon Bud sign, when do you think agents should present an offer in person? JL (interrupts): When the client is super freakin hot. GBB: We’re cutting you off, Joe. Paula? PH: If there are multiple offers on a great non-bank owned property.  GBB: No wonder you have your own team. I only have two hamsters and a ferret named “W.” 

GBB: Tanya, What is the best housewarming gift for a client? TN: A house. GBB: That was a good answer for someone with a cocktail napkin on her head.  You’re new at The Redhead, so you get a bonus question: What is the biggest hindrance to closing a deal? TN: Egos. GBB: You clever l’il Canadian – I love brevity! KB: That’s what Loomer’s wife says. GBB: Joe, I noticed that Grant is cutting off your oxygen. Before you pass out, can you tell me the most difficult aspect of a real estate deal? JL: Negotiating repairs or dealing with uneducated agents. That, and they rescinded the “shooting idiots” law in Georgia. GBB: And what’s your must successful means of advertising? The Playgirl spread I did, yeah, that’s how I roll.  (Collective groans) 

GBB: Last call, folks. Where’s Brandie? KB: (Bleary eyed and unfazed by his karaoke partner’s disappearance.) Grant bounced her and called the cops five minutes ago for stapling her business cards all over the piano. TN: She sure is a marketing wizard. GBB (yells across the bar to Grant):  Hey Hammerin’ Hammond –  you like your job too much! GH:  Yeah, I believe Forest Gump best described my feelings here with the whole box of chocolates thing. GBB: So where’s Brandie? PH: Forget that miscreant!  More importantly…where’s Waldo? JL: Probably in the cell next to Brandie.  ( They all jump on stage and do a fabulous rendition of “Take me Home.”  They dedicate their song to Brandie as she sobers up in L.A.’s luxurious County Lockup.)

Thanks to my colleagues for their valuable input and their willingness to participate in virtual mayhem. Ken Brand, a veteran in real estate, is the Real Estate Sales Manager of Prudential Gary Green Realtors  in Woodlands, Texas. Paul Henry is the dynamo leader of the top notch Henry Group at Red Door Real Estate in Indianapolis. Brandie Young is a San Francisco marketing guru, trail blazer and founder of consulting firm MarketingTBD. Tanya Nouwens  has combined 29 years of Montreal real estate experience with the home staging experience of Ready, Set…Sold! Inc to form a Canadian power team.  Joe Loomer  is Assistant Team Leader at Keller Williams Realty Augusta Partners and author of the wise and witty blog, Fruit of the Loomer.  Grant Hammond, our “bouncer,” just joined us. He is an award winning  Nashville real estate market expert. Los Angeles host and blogger Gwen Banta  can be found at www.L.A.Homesite.com, or checking coats at The Redhead Lounge – tips welcome.

I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.

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32 Comments

32 Comments

  1. Joe Loomer

    March 19, 2010 at 8:34 am

    Oh the Humanity.

    My head feels like Gwen’s ankles after that night out!

    Navy Chief, Navy Pride!

  2. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    Those huge “kankles” belonged to our dear friend Brandie Young. I’m the one who was stuck with the huge bar bill. Are Grant’s thumb prints still in your neck? (I think our rendition of “House of the Rising Sun” drove him over the edge.)

  3. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    Hey friends (and sworn enemies) – I forgot to ask what your real Estate Karaoke song is – it must have something to do with real estate in the title…

  4. Tanya Nouwens

    March 19, 2010 at 3:23 pm

    “Tanya has combined 29 years of Montreal real estate experience…” Oy vey! How old do you think I am? Granted, I always age after a night of “spirited” karaoke, and cosmetic surgery may have been more prudent than that lesson in texting from the marketing whiz kid named “U”, but cherie….it’s my BROKER who has lasted 29 years in this nutty biz. Though she in fact looks younger than me. OK nevermind. Pass the wine please.

  5. Tanya Nouwens

    March 19, 2010 at 3:24 pm

    “Tiptoe…Through the Tulips.”

  6. Tanya Nouwens

    March 19, 2010 at 3:29 pm

    And on other days, “I Will Survive.”

  7. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 3:47 pm

    Sorry, Tanya – I misquoted your website material. That happens when one’s arteries harden. I meant to say that you LOOK 29, and when I had to pick you up off the floor at the Redhead, you still looked 29 – dissipated, but 29. Here, let me top that off for you….

  8. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 4:05 pm

    I love them both, Tanya, although tulips are hard to find in real estate. I’m thinking of more prickly flowers, such as “Every Rose Has Its Thorns” by Guns and Roses. Of course, I work in Los Angeles, so that may explain my cynicism. “I Will Survive” is a very positive attitude, although I may have considered “Love This Pain” by Lady Antebellum.

  9. Joe Loomer

    March 19, 2010 at 8:54 pm

    Hic – uh, ok, – hic – uh, ok – hic – uh, ok – Brandie? Where’s my wallet? Ken? This dude’s looking at me funny, Gwen, I’m going all Desert Storm on him if he don’t quit.

    Ok, Brandie!! Brandie!! where are you? Well s#%#cicles, there goes my ride – I can’t call the Wiff. Jen! Jen!! Ken! Whatever the $##% your name is! Gimme my wallet!! I swear I got a “Get Home Free” card in there somewhere from Gwen’s last party! C’mon! The “Places OJ slept” Open House doesn’t close for another thirty minutes! We can be there in ten! Who you gotta *#$% to get a cab in this place? #%% it, I’m going back to Georgia, at least there I can call my wife and sister (no, they’re not one and the same) to come get me on a night like this.

    Navy (hic), Navy (hic) Navy (hic), Maybe (hic), Baby (hic), oh %#$# it, see you next weee(hic) next week

  10. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 9:13 pm

    You are seriously in need of help, Mr. Loomer. There was no Jen there, but now that I recall, there was a Jim. I saw him winking at you when you were doing your karaoke number. Is there anything you want to share with your AG pals? C’mon – spill it!

  11. Joe Loomer

    March 19, 2010 at 9:18 pm

    Twenty one years of service to this country and THIS is what I get? MORE sexual predeliction comments? Good googley moogley. Hair of the Dog time! Honey? Where’s my drink? Jim? Jim!! I’m talking to you!

  12. Joe Loomer

    March 19, 2010 at 9:21 pm

    Oh #%#. Wife just saw the last post. I got some ‘splainin to do!

  13. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 10:44 pm

    Before Sherri confines you to the house for your own safety, tell me quickly: What is your Real Estate Karaoke song? I love the answers I’m getting!

  14. Ken Brand

    March 19, 2010 at 11:24 pm

    Ummm, I don’t remember anything. I think I blacked out, my forehead’s bruised.

  15. Gwen Banta

    March 19, 2010 at 11:32 pm

    And yet you still managed to impart some sage advice, Ken – you must have brain cells to burn!

  16. Michael Bertoldi

    March 20, 2010 at 12:48 am

    LOL, You guys have owned the comments and this post. You all crack me up.

    (Smart real estate peeps are crazy!) Shhh

  17. Gwen Banta

    March 20, 2010 at 2:20 am

    Emphasis on the “smart.” Even geniuses know how to roll. Thanks, Michael.

  18. Joe Loomer

    March 20, 2010 at 10:09 am

    Our House – Graham Nash (Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young)

  19. Brandie Young

    March 20, 2010 at 3:51 pm

    First, you are all terribly insensitive to chide me on my fat ankles.

    Update: I made some new friends in the lockup – probably because I look fabulous in an orange jumpsuit! p.s. Gwen, thanks for the bail money. I promise the IOU is as good as the cocktail napkin on which it’s written.

    Finally, for our next number, Ken Brand and I will sing our own rendition of “This Must Be the Place” by the Talking Heads.

    Cheers!

  20. Gwen Banta

    March 21, 2010 at 9:25 pm

    Brandie, I have no doubt you made new friends; and with your brilliant marketing skills, they probably all became clients. We all could learn a lot from you…if we could just stop staring at your ankles 🙂

  21. Gwen Banta

    March 21, 2010 at 9:30 pm

    Incidentally, Brandie, I like the karaoke choice. I was thinking of performing “This House is On Fire” by Natalie Merchant. I couldn’t find a song title that said, “Buy this House Dammit – We’ve Seen A Hundred Already!”

  22. Nashville Grant

    March 28, 2010 at 9:23 am

    Never has selling real estate been this entertaining or fun. Not even in 2005.

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Business Marketing

Use the ‘Blemish Effect’ to skyrocket your sales

(MARKETING) The Blemish Effect dictates that small, adjacent flaws in a product can make it that much more interesting—is perfection out?

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blemish effect

Presenting a product or service in its most immaculate, polished state has been the strategy for virtually all organizations, and overselling items with known flaws is a practice as old as time. According to marketing researchers, however, this approach may not be the only way to achieve optimal results due to something known as the “Blemish Effect.”

The Blemish Effect isn’t quite the inverse of the perfectionist product pitch; rather, it builds on the theory that small problems with a product or service can actually throw into relief its good qualities. For example, a small scratch on the back of an otherwise pristine iPhone might draw one’s eye to the glossy finish, while an objectively perfect housing might not be appreciated in the same way.

The same goes for mildly bad press or a customer’s pros and cons list. If someone has absolutely no complaints or desires for whatever you’re marketing, the end result can look flat and lacking in nuance. Having the slightest bit of longing associated with an aspect (or lack thereof) of your business means that you have room to grow, which can be tantalizing for the eager consumer.

A Stanford study indicates that small doses of mildly negative information may actually strengthen a consumer’s positive impression of a product or service. Interesting.

Another beneficial aspect of the Blemish Effect is that it helps consumers focus their negativity. “Too good to be true” often means exactly that, and we’re eager to criticize where possible. If your product or service has a noticeable flaw which doesn’t harm the item’s use, your audience might settle for lamenting the minor flaw and favoring the rest of the product rather than looking for problems which don’t exist.

This concept also applies to expectation management. Absent an obvious blemish, it can be all to easy for consumers to envision your product or service on an unattainable level.

When they’re invariably disappointed that their unrealistic expectations weren’t fulfilled, your reputation might take a hit, or consumers might lose interest after the initial wave.

The takeaway is that consumers trust transparency, so in describing your offering, tossing in a negative boosts the perception that you’re being honest and transparent, so a graphic artist could note that while their skills are superior and their pricing reasonable, they take their time with intricate projects. The time expectation is a potentially negative aspect of their service, but expressing anything negative improves sales as it builds trust.

It should be noted that the Blemish Effect applies to minor impairments in cosmetic or adjacent qualities, not in the product or service itself. Delivering an item which is inherently flawed won’t make anyone happy.

In an age where less truly is more, the Blemish Effect stands to dictate a new wave of honesty in marketing.

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Business Marketing

Google Chrome will no longer allow premium extensions

(MARKETING) In banning extension payments through their own platform, Google addresses a compelling, if self-created, issue on Chrome.

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Google Chrome open on a laptop on a organized desk.

Google has cracked down on various practices over the past couple of years, but their most recent target—the Google Chrome extensions store—has a few folks scratching their heads.
Over the span of the next few months, Google will phase out paid extensions completely, thus ending a bizarre and relatively negligible corner of internet economy.

This decision comes on the heels of a “temporary” ban on the publication of new premium extensions back in March. According to Engadget, all aspects of paid extension use—including free trials and in-app purchases—will be gone come February 2021.

To be clear, Google’s decision won’t prohibit extension developers from charging customers to use their products; instead, extension developers will be required to find alternative methods of requesting payment. We’ve seen this model work on a donation basis with extensions like AdBlock. But shifting to something similar on a comprehensive scale will be something else entirely.

Interestingly, Google’s angle appears to be in increasing user safety. The Verge reports that their initial suspension of paid extensions was put into place as a response to products that included “fraudulent transactions”, and Google’s subsequent responses since then have comprised more user-facing actions such as removing extensions published by different parties that accomplish replica tasks.

Review manipulation, use of hefty notifications as a part of an extension’s operation, and generally spammy techniques were also eyeballed by Google as problem points in their ongoing suspension leading up to the ban.

In banning extension payments through their own platform, Google addresses a compelling, if self-created, issue. The extension store was a relatively free market in a sense—something that, given the number of parameters being enforced as of now, is less true for the time being.

Similarly, one can only wonder about which avenues vendors will choose when seeking payment for their services in the future. It’s entirely possible that, after Google Chrome shuts down payments in February, the paid section of the extension market will crumble into oblivion, the side effects of which we can’t necessarily picture.

For now, it’s probably best to hold off on buying any premium extensions; after all, there’s at least a fighting chance that they’ll all be free come February—if we make it that far.

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Business Marketing

Bite-sized retail: Macy’s plans to move out of malls

(BUSINESS MARKETING) While Macy’s shares have recently climbed, the department store chain is making a change in regards to big retail shopping malls.

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Macy's retail storefront, which may look different as they scale to smaller stores.

I was recently listening to a podcast on Barstool Sports, and was surprised to hear that their presenting sponsor was Macy’s. This struck me as odd considering the demographic for the show is women in their twenties to thirties, and Macy’s typically doesn’t cater to that crowd. Furthermore, department retail stores are becoming a bit antiquated as is.

The sponsorship made more sense once I learned that Macy’s is restructuring their operation, and now allowing their brand to go the way of the ghost. They feel that while malls will remain in operation, only the best (AKA the malls with the most foot traffic) will stand the test of changes in the shopping experience.

As we’ve seen a gigantic rise this year in online shopping, stores like Macy’s and JC Penney are working hard to keep themselves afloat. There is so much changing in brick and mortar retail that major shifts need to be made.

So, what is Macy’s proposing to do?

The upscale department store chain is going to be testing smaller stores in locations outside of major shopping malls. Bloomingdale’s stores will be doing the same. “We continue to believe that the best malls in the country will thrive,” CEO Jeff Gennette told CNBC analysts. “However, we also know that Macy’s and Bloomingdale’s have high potential [off]-mall and in smaller formats.”

While the pandemic assuredly plays a role in this, the need for change came even before the hit in March. Macy’s had announced in February their plans to close 125 stores in the next three years. This is in conjunction with Macy’s expansion of Macy’s Backstage, which offers more affordable options.

Gennette also stated that while those original plans are still in place, Macy’s has been closely monitoring the competition in the event that they need to adjust the store closure timeline. At the end of the second quarter, Macy’s had 771 stores, including Bloomingdale’s and Bluemercury.

Last week, Macy’s shares climbed 3 percent, after the retailer reported a more narrow loss than originally expected, along with stronger sales due to an uptick in their online business. So they’re already doing well in that regard. But will smaller stores be the change they need to survive?

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