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No, billionaires shouldn’t try to ‘save’ the housing market

Grant Cardone suggested that he and other investors should ‘save’ the housing market – predictably, Reddit hasn’t stopped laughing.

An aerial view of a neighborhood in diagonal lines from each other, showing part of the housing market.

Why do billionaires thrive on phrasing their own means of needlessly expanding their income as… charity?

Call me a jealous peasant if you must, it’s not wholly off the mark, but if the hoarders are absolutely compelled to cause more damage to the rest of us because they’re howling holes that can never be filled even in death—can’t they at least call what they’re doing what it is? 

Grant Cardone has it in his head that he, and the other gilded jackals are going to save the housing market from crashing by swooping in at the last minute to buy up all the homes. You know, right as the value is at its lowest, and they get to pay whoever’s name is on the deed as little as possible.


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I’ll inject some transparency before I continue. I don’t approve of buying multiple houses to rent, or as is more likely the case with most people reading this, mortgaging multiple houses to rent. Everyone and their dog choosing to invest in real estate drove prices up beyond what most people could afford even a loan for, leaving many of us looking at renting for life and being looked down on

Of course most landlords didn’t see this as their problem until talks of rent freezes and strikes went around as the pandemic began. That bump, for investors who aren’t billionaires, and couldn’t  buy their excess homes in cash will only be one of the first. 

But fear not, average investor. When your rentals can’t stay full due to layoffs, and rampant disease, and polygamous multi-person relationships coalescing six people’s incomes to purchase a home of their own… Grant and his ilk will be there. 

From Business Insider India

As home prices decline, that could draw investors back into the housing market, per Cardone.

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It’s a likely scenario as institutional real-estate investors have earmarked as much as $110 billion to purchase or build single-family-rental homes in the coming years, according to an estimate from real-estate-research and investment-banking firm Zelman & Associates.

Cardone is directly quoted as saying “….there will be no housing crash. Investors, like myself, will save the day and step in to buy the homes.”. 

Now of course that characterization is ridiculous. This isn’t our boy Clark Kent spandexing it up to save orphans from rockslides. This is just one immorally rich dude letting the public know that he and his friends are gonna be here to take your stuff from the housing market. And the bank’s stuff. 

The good folks on Reddit have been pointing out how headdeskingly terrible this all sounds and is. 

Cisco-NintendoSwitch says:

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“I was making a few bucks over min wage before and houses I was aspiring to own were around 200-250k at the time. I now have a much better job 5 years later and those same houses are 500k+”

Flavius_Lacivious says (amongst many other quite spicy things I had to cut around):  “That people now have to choose between housing and food because of pricks like this and they are trying to spin it as if they are heroes like we don’t know they are gigantic parasites?”

User wednesdaynightwumbo even pointed out Cardone’s hyperhypocrisy, showing that he advised the less rich against buying real estate at all. 

Then again, rules for billionaires are always different. 

For all us landless plebs, things aren’t going to change much if this ‘superhero’ does as he says he will. We’ll keep renting, stockpiling firearms, and paying up to whoever. It doesn’t make a difference whose rental management company’s name is on our e-transfers. 

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For those of you with a vested interest in continuing to rent, rather than sell at a loss…well, no one ever said all investments were a guaranteed win. You’ll just get to be a tinfoil jackal with nothing but your own home to live in, and ideally an actual job that’ll let you upkeep it. Or you can come rent with the rest of us.

By the way…malicious metaphors aside, jackals are actually pretty cool. Maybe take some lessons from them about living on less, and making the best of their niche despite public opinion. Just in case.

You can't spell "Together" without TGOT: That Goth Over There. Staff Writer, April Bingham, is that goth; and she's all about building bridges— both metaphorically between artistry and entrepreneurship, and literally with tools she probably shouldn't be allowed to learn how to use.


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