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Chrome plugin appeals to your inner passive aggressive socially anxious self

(TECH NEWS) If you’re too passive aggressive to tell Felicia from accounting to gtfo out of your office, use this Chrome plugin to make your phone ring. Oops, gotta take this call, bye Felicia!

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nope browser plugin

There’s a button for everything

Summon a car or a smoothie with a touch, buy anything from shampoo to diamonds with a click, and restock your laundry detergent from the comfort of your laundry room with a literal button you can stick on your wall. All the while, Staples’ robotic “That was easy” slogan will ring incessantly in your ears.

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We’ve solved a lot of annoying problems with buttons, but many nuisances continue to roam free, unbuttoned. For instance, no matter how easy it is to order detergent, we still have to do the darn laundry, instead of our clothes just taking responsibility for themselves and doing their own washing up.

The problems we’ve yet to solve are as multifarious as they are nefarious. We have to deal not only with annoying chores, but also with annoying people. These people have infiltrated our entire lives, from restaurants, to parties, and even our workplaces. No matter how well-meaning Janice from Accounting is, she doesn’t give af that you have work to do – she will tell you all about her niece’s recital or her dachshund’s toy preferences (he’ll take a squeaky chew toy over a tug-of-war toy any day, FYI).

Now a button for annoying coworkers

Next time Janice from Accounting heads your way, wouldn’t it be nice if you could push a button and make her turn around? A new Chrome plugin called NOPE is making your passive aggressive dreams a reality.

Here’s what you have to do. First, install the plugin and set it up with your phone number proactively. A small green icon with the letter “N” will appear in your browser. Then, when Janice from Accounting tries to launch into the saga of her gluten intolerance, discreetly click the icon and apologize profusely as your phone begins to ring.

You’re getting a call from New York – sorry Janice, another time! But there will be no other time.

Because with this button, you are now the master of your desk, ruler of your productivity, and all-around winner, now and forever.

Until, you know, Janice notices that you get a phone call literally every time she sees you. Or she reads this article. Or evolves a mutation in which she sheds the human decency that allows for private phone calls and is able to talk over whatever fake phone conversation you make up, and you eventually realize it’s easier to just let her talk without having to improv a phone call twice a day.

Seriously, if you need this plugin to be productive at work, you need to work on your communication skills. Give it to Janice straight, and get back to work already.

nope

#NOPE

Staff Writer, Natalie Bradford earned her B.A. in English from Cornell University and spends a lot of time convincing herself not to bake MORE brownies. She enjoys cats, cocktails, and good films - preferably together. She is currently working on a collection of short stories.

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Tech News

Facebook Ads Manager unreliability keeps dumpster fire rep alive

(SOCIAL MEDIA) The Facebook Ads Manager isn’t exactly reliable, refunds aren’t offered, and social media practitioners hate the (still) necessary evil.

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If there is one thing upon which we can rely when it comes to Facebook, it’s disappointing us. Sure, it is clear that the platform has done amazing things to connect people from all over the world. It allows the sharing of passions, photos, ideas, lifestyles, and pointlessly hilarious memes. But we have all glimpsed the dark underbelly of the social media giant.

Facebook regularly shows us the ugliest side of ourselves. This is a topic that is covered ALL. THE. TIME. How many of us have expressed our regret that Auntie posted insensitive views with the same pride she shares her great-grandchild’s first touchdown in the junior divisional beauty pageant and peewee football game?

But the content created by users is not Facebook’s latest letdown.

Ad buyers are regularly unable to see the analytics of their campaigns. For example, on October 29th, a number of digital media professionals found the Facebook Ads Manager to be unresponsive for hours. This lapse in availability is devastating to those who purchase ad space. This was aggravated by the fact that many campaigns were time sensitive, as they focused on the midterm elections.

Further, online advertisers rely on instant feedback and data to inform their next decisions. Many have expressed that the October 29th outage is a fairly regular occurrence with Facebook and continues to make their jobs nightmares.

Additionally, refunds were not offered for the time advertisers had purchased and not been able to use.

This recent occurrence appears to be the longest shutdown of FB Ads Manager, contributing to the dumpster fire of a reputation Facebook ads have cultivated.

We continue to ask – how can such a wealthy and dominating platform not get this issue into check? Or is it part of a broader design to lower expectations and soak up money like an adult child living in their parent’s basement, with no end in sight?

Facebook continues to decline commenting on their unreliability. Perhaps they know that all the Baby Boomers and Gen Xers will continue to use, share, swoon, and offend regardless of internal issues, and that advertisers will not (for some time) be able to subsist without reaching these groups.

For now, it seems Facebook is still in the driver’s seat. Whether or not they know how to drive this dumpster on wheels is another matter.

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Silicon Valley created tech for your family that’s too addictive for theirs

(TECHNOLOGY) Tech inventors are big on innovating and advancing tools, but a growing parenting trend in tech circles seems hypocritical.

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tech addiction in children

I consider myself an older Millennial. I was slowly but surely introduced to technologies as they became mass-marketable, but they didn’t affect every moment of my day-to-day life. I learned how to use computers in elementary school, I chatted on AOL as a preteen, and when I was 16, my parents gave me my own cell phone “for emergencies.” I promptly dropped it under the car seat, where it remained for a year, before I or my parents even noticed that it was missing.

In less than a generation, our relationship to cell phones has transformed completely. For one thing, my first cell phone didn’t have a touchscreen. It didn’t have an internet connection. Hell, for an entire year, I didn’t even use the damn thing.

Fast forward to 2018, when your children can learn to use an iPad at the same time that they learn to use a toilet.

Interestingly, the tech whizzes who designed much of the technology that now pervades nearly every moment of our lives seem wariest of the negative impact screen time might have on kids. The NYT reports that the trend amongst Silicon Valley parents is to severely limit or even ban cell phone use by their children.

Parents in all echelons of the tech industry are limiting their kids’ exposure. Steve Jobs kept iPads out of the hands of his young children. The Gates offspring didn’t receive cell phones until high school (just like me, in 2001), and Tim Cook discourages his nephew from using social networks.

These concerned parents describe the addictive potential and negative consequences of screen time in increasingly pessimistic terms.

Athena Chavarria, a former Facebook employee, believes that “the devil lives in our phones and is wreaking havoc on our children.”

Chris Anderson (yes that Chris Anderson), former editor of Wired and founder of GeekDad, says that when it comes to screens, “On a scale between candy and crack cocaine, it’s closer to crack cocaine.”

Parents are even making contractual agreements to make sure their kids don’t use screens while under the supervision of their nanny or babysitter.

Like basically every human idea or invention ever, connected, screened devices reveal that our ability to create new technologies far outpaces our ability to understand the consequences – positive or negative – of that tech.

Those closest to the situation – the inventors themselves – are often the first ones to sound the alarm when they realize that their hard-won advancements may not have been such a great idea after all.

Said Chris Anderson of the addictive nature of cell phones, “We thought we could control it. And this is beyond our power to control.”

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Why entrepreneurs are flocking to the pet technology space

(TECH) Pet technology is a burgeoning, $70B industry, but what makes it so attractive to entrepreneurs aside from kittens and puppers?

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fetch my pet

According to science and/or math, the internet is fueled by pet pictures. We all love pictures of animals, but more than that, we love our actual tangible animals, and as a culture, we’ve used social media to do more than share – we’re all learning from each other about best practices and products.

We’ve noticed that the pet technology space is figuratively blowing up right now, so we asked Greg Tariff, Founder and CEO of Fetch my Pet why the industry’s blossoming in such a way.

In his own words below, Tariff effectively explains why entrepreneurs are making their way into the $70 billion industry:

This growth is driven in part by millennial consumers: about 75% in their 30s own a dog and about 50% own a cat—and 44% see their pets as “starter children.” In other words, millennials not only own more pets than any other generation, but offer a better standard of care and are changing the pet business landscape with their buying habits. Millennials think of pets as family.

It’s a great time for entrepreneurs to be making their way into the pet technology space. Studies show consumers are willing to pay more for higher quality food and pet products, and they are ready to engage in experiences with their pets. Now it’s up to pet brands to connect with these pet owners on a deeper level, and I believe technology can bridge that gap. Here’s how technology is improving pet ownership thanks to a number of new innovations and a shift in consumer trends:

Humans can interact with pets remotely. Marketed as “digital daycare for pets,” technology like PetChatz lets pet parents interact with their pets from outside of the home. The need for this type of technology is driven in part by our view of pets. We no longer see pets as owned objects, but rather members of our family. How we classify pets has a ripple effect on the pet ownership experience. Consumers are more willing to pay for high quality products and services, and businesses will have to offer the highest-quality experiences to retain customers. Plus there’s a market for technology like PetChatz that allows us to interact with our pets from a distance in real time.

Making pet life management simple for pet parents. Worldwide online sales of pet food increased from 6 to 14 percent in 2016, with sales of dog and cat food rising at least 14% in the U.S. alone. It’s very easy for pet owners to click to order food, find places to walk and play with their pets, and connect with other pet owners. For example, Fetch my Pet is learning about customers and their pet needs to make more contextual suggestions. If you have an 7-year-old Golden Retriever, your technology shouldn’t tell you to buy puppy food or puppy Chew toys. As pet life management technology continues to advance, the pet ownership experience will become more personalized and intuitive.

Artificial Intelligence enables predictive fulfillment. As more data is collected on pets and their habits via makers of the products and services consumed by pet parents, we will soon have the ability to embark on preventative pet healthcare and predictive fulfilment of products and services for our pets. What if Petco sent you a notification once they had a new sustainable dog food in stock because they knew you were low on kibble? We’re inching close to this reality.

Paving the way for brand and ingredient integrity. The more innovation that occurs in the pet space, the more selective consumers can be about what they purchase and why. We care very deeply about what we feed our pets. According to Purina, young adults are more likely than other groups to research foods when designing their pet’s diet, and they like to have options that include natural ingredients and real meat.

Companies like BareItAll Petfoods are taking food-sourcing one step further by selling food products made from Asian Carp, which threaten to harm waterways including the Great Lakes. Businesses are doing their part to get smarter about ingredient integrity – and consumers are being more selective.

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