Sunday, January 11, 2026

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It’s getting closer to Goblin Day, friends, so I thought I’d show you some of the Halloween treats provided by our always dependable MLS. Some of these will haunt a few spelling-challenged agents to their graves:

Scare Tactics and Fanatics 

“Seller wants a rabid close” (Thank you, Cujo.) 

“No showings until carving” (That’s caravan, you turkey.) 

“Hair is the one we’ve been waiting for.” (…whispered Bruce Willis to Sean Connery.)

“Needs miner repairs” (‘Seems someone’s getting the shaft!) 

“Drop by for delicious threats” (FSBO – offered by Sean Penn) 

Below the Belt 

“New hot weter filter” (I believe that’s called a ‘Depends.’) 

“Big screen on john area” (Uh, to filter out corn?) 

“Can meat for one hour only” (If it lasts more than four hours, call your doctor.) 

“New paint and cocking” (Let me guess – you want to meat for one hour?) 

“Patio with custom chairs, ottoman, croch BBQ area” (Hmmm – this gives new meaning to “putting a shrimp on the barbie.”) 

The Beat Goes On 

“Brand new licting” (I suspect this is “tongue-in-cheek.”) 

“Prospecting buyers need to be pre-approved” (What is this – a Gold Rush?) 

“Exposed bean ceiling” (Former home of Jack and his famous Stalk) 

“Each was carefully selected and then laid” (Correction: This is the former home of Jack and his famous Stalk.) 

Clever Endeavors 

“New October Listing – Here today, Goblin tomorrow!” (Now here’s one that has a ghost of a chance!)

Gwen Banta
Gwen Bantahttps://www.LAhomesite.com
I wear several hats: My mink fedora real estate hat belongs to Sotheby’s International Realty on the world famous Sunset Strip. I’M not world famous, but I've garnered a few Top Producer credits along the way. I also wear a coonskin writer's cap with an arrow through it, having written a few novels and screenplays and scored a few awards there, too. (The arrow was from a tasteless critic.) My sequined turban is my thespian hat for my roles on stage, and in film and television, Dahling. You can check me out in all my infamy at LinkedIn, LAhomesite.com, SherlockOfHomes, IMDB or you can shoot arrows at my head via email. I can take it.

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